Organization XVIII
by Irritus185
Summary: Traveling across the dimensions, destroying evil, wooing dames, and screwing up along the way. That sums Shinji up pretty well. Oh, and he has Asuka and Rei to keep him in line...kinda. Just read it. You won't be disappointed...maybe. KHxEVA crossover
1. Beginning the Journey

A/N: Well, here's my third fanfic that I plan on devoting to. It's a crossover between Evangelion and Kingdom Hearts. The way it came to me was kind of funny. One of my friends in college was visiting me. I explained some of my other ideas for Eva fanfics, but he was mainly there to play Kingdom Hearts. It was then he suggested, "Hey, why don't you mix the two together?" It was from that sentence that this monstrosity was born. Expect lots of jokes – clever, somewhat acceptable from a moral standpoint, ones that should never be uttered in front of old people, and all kinds of one in between. Hopefully, you'll enjoy this. See ya at the end!

Disclaimer: I do not own either Evangelion or Kingdom Hearts. I also do not own Utena, Excel Saga, Ranma ½, Slayers, Gakuen Heaven, Antique Bakery, Sailor Moon, Cowboy Bebop, D-Gray Man, Love Hina, Inukami, .hack, Vandread, FLCL, Trigun, Tenchi Muyo, Gravitation, Louie the Rune Soldier, Fushigi Yugi, or any other anime, games, or series that I may eventually think of. (deep breath) Whoo! That was a lot.

**Warning: Side effects to reading this fanfiction include but are not limited to: uncontrollable laughter, twitching, irrevocable brain damage, and nausea. We are not responsible for any thoughts of hatred towards the anime used in this story, but you may despise the author. Please read at your own risk.**

**Organization XVIII  
Chapter 1: Beginning the Journey (or) Starting off on the Wrong Foot(s)  
By Irritus185**

Humans have always wondered what was beyond the boundaries to their lives. Now this doesn't mean that the boundaries are interesting, and in fact may be a quite lovely place to live, but humans seem to have some inexplicable desire to go out into the unknown. Sometimes it could be a grand adventure, sometimes it could be a horrifying tale, but most of the time they discover that the outside is more or less like the inside.

In fact, they meet people there who wonder what the outside of their boundaries look like, which consequently is the original people's inside. Everything is the same no matter where you go. To quote, a normal conversation between the outside and inside people, or inside and outside people if you like that way better, may go something like this.

The person from the inside, or outside, would say something like, "Hello, I've come from the inside."

Then the other person, to avoid this confusing mixing of positions, would answer, "Oh, you mean from the outside?"

"No, I mean from the inside, but oh, never mind that. What I wanted to ask was how much different this place is from mine. Is the sky blue?"

"Why, yes. And it's usually full of the fluffiest clouds."

"Ah, I see. And are the seasons in the right order? Spring, summer, fall, winter?"

"Of course, what kind of silly question is that?"

"I see…And do you play Bingo on Fridays?"

"Heavens, no. What a barbaric ritual. On Fridays we tar-and-feather people from out of town."

"Well then, I suppose it's a good thing it's Thursday, eh?"

"Actually it is Friday. You must have crossed the International Dateline on the way over."

In which the first person would be carried off to be tarred-and-feathered in a manner most unpleasant.

Well, maybe there are some significant differences in places that are out of boundaries. But we are not here to discuss the strange traditions of certain villages that shall not be named. Instead, our story is focused on quite a young lad from a rather uninteresting city in a rather uninteresting country on a rather uninteresting spinning ball of water and mud. Of course, it is up to the reader to decide whether or not this city and country and ball of mud is of interest to them, but believe me, there's really no point to worry about them. But if you insist, the town is Tokyo-3 in Japan on planet Earth. However, it is certain that the Quarkithers of Zekine-9 would not care much about the specifics as long as they a hot steaming Yoahy in front of them. But then they probably would never read such a story in the first place, now would they? The other reason for this is that the story did not even begin in downtown Tokyo-3.

It started out in the sea, an altogether much more remarkable place.

OTOTOTOTOT

The sea stretched on for miles, deep into the horizon, and further than they eye could see. It was a clear and bright blue, one that reflected the sky that was unmarred by any clouds, and whose sun shined down brightly upon it. There were no discrepancies in the sea's surface which made it rather boring in a way. One would really care about this though, as anyone would love to be in the sea at any time. Who doesn't love a good trip to the sea to relax and forget everyday life? It was the one point that broke this monotony, a small body that floated on sea's surface.

The body was that of Shinji Ikari. A rather boring boy, his short brown hair stuck to his temples, his chocolate brown eyes staring at the sky in bewilderment, his scrawny form laying perfectly. He had been in this life for only fourteen years, and never once before had he found himself floating on the sea, alone. In fact, to him, it was quite preposterous. Shinji was a nervous lad and had trouble dealing with confusing things.

"Hey, wait a minute, I can't swim."

He also had the unfortunate tendency to second-guess every situation. In this case, it was his ability to effortlessly float on the water. For the nth-number of times in his life, it was not something he should have questioned.

"Hey! What do you mean by – gack!"

As Shinji sank into the deep abyss that had once been the sea, many thought ran through his mind. Thoughts of wishing his life had been fuller. Thoughts of wishing that he had taken more chances. Thoughts of regret. Thoughts of his family, his friends. Mostly he thought of how he'd like to be able to swim right now, or how a tank of oxygen would just magically appear by his side. His lungs were beginning to become heavily compressed, and the only way he could fill them up again would be water. As much as he liked the liquid, he didn't feel like having that intimate of a relationship at this point in time.

His lungs screamed for air. Shinji shrugged. Well, he supposed they would just have to accept water as a temporary substitute. At least he wouldn't have to deal with his family or friends again.

_During his journey to death, Shinji decided to screw it all and bring out all the bad times and events he had incurred from his family and friends. It's a very common occurrence in humans so don't be too judgmental of him, okay? The next time you're confronted by a very large grizzly bear while smelling of fish, or finding your date has a fetish for clowns and peanut oil, see how you react to the whole deal._

As he opened the gates to his throat, Shinji expelled what would be the last of his life when he impacted with the hard floor beneath him. He coughed, spitting up some water that managed to seep in.

When he did, Shinji rose to his feet and took a look at the place that had replaced the watery grave he thought he was supposed to be dying in. It was a large circular platform, about 15.3461 meters in diameter and levitating above what appeared to be eternal fall into everlasting darkness. Whatever entered that pitch-black night would surely never return. Shinji found the place rather cozy.

The platform had numerous pictures scrawled across it, in crayon no less, but as to what the pictures were Shinji had no idea. They had the artistic talent of a quadriplegic five-year-old with epilepsy, and the rest of the drawing weren't nearly as good. Was that supposed to be a dog or some kind of toaster-death-machine? Actually, if you tilted your head to the right, it looked a bit like monkey holding a banana, or was it a toothbrush? The crayon rubbed against his shoes as he scuffed the pictures, smearing them with royal blue. Aww…and he had just gotten them, too!

Shinji began to explore the rest of the room, nothing really important about. In fact, he was the only being there. So instead of drowning in a majestic sea, he would spend the rest of his days on a platform in the middle of nowhere? Eh, even tradeoff.

"You must make a choice."

Shinji spun around at the voice that came from behind him. Standing there was a man in a cloak, his head covered by a hood, and shrouded in shadows. He had a mysterious air to him, and Shinji could feel the power that radiated from deep within his clothing. His voice was deep and musical, drawing Shinji closer. While he was scared of what the man could do to him, Shinji was attracted to him and what he might be able to do for him. He took a step closer.

"Um, can you tell me who you are?"

"Eh, you can't tell?" The man grumbled, and scrambling could be heard as the man searched for something. "Ah, here it is." The clink of a chain, the chick of a switch, and the area was suddenly bathed in bright light from a large florescent lamp. "There, can you see me now?"

Shinji had to cover his eyes for a moment as he was blinded. But when he looked up, the man that he had seen before had changed significantly with the help of truth-gleaming, fantasy-shattering light. The man was in his late-forties, heavy set and rotund. The cloak he wore consisted of a tattered sweatshirt with the words "Newark Construction" and a pair of worn jeans. Both the jeans and sweatshirt and jeans were covered in sweat stains and mustard from the hot dog the man was shoving into his mouth. The sweatshirt didn't make it over his beer belly, hairy and overflowing on his jeans. He threw the hoodie back, revealing an unkempt face of facial hair, piggy eyes and nose, and cheeks stained with flush. He finished eating the hot dog and swallowed, his tone transforming into that of a Newark accent.

"Sous, what can I dous for yas, kid?"

He tried to get his mouth working again. Shinji was not the kind of person to react to situations quickly. "Who are you again?"

"Eh, can'ts yous tell, kid? I'm da Prophecy Fairy. I deliver alls da prophecies of the woirld to snot-nosed brats like yourselfs."

Shinji shook his head. "Um, then where's your wings and wand?"

The Fairy shook his head. "I left thems back at home. Look, kid, dous yous want your prophecy or not?"

"I…guess?" Shinji responded uncertainly. What an odd turn of events. First he was drowning and then he was the receiver of a prophecy. Perhaps this meant that he was going to be the hero of some wonderful tale. Oh he did wish so! But he must be back in time for supper. He had to make sure he had dinner cooked before his father got back from work, or else the dear old man would start bawling his eyes out. Such a sensitive person…

"Very wells then."

The Fairy walked back over to where he had first been standing and yanked a giant lever that was jutting out of the ground. The platform began to shake, and Shinji found it hard to stay on his feet. When he managed to regain his balance, he noticed three identical altars emerging from the floor. They were about a few feet tall and made out of pure marble. Engraved on their front was a mysterious message that Shinji couldn't read from the distance he was at. Atop each one was item of great power, each one quite different.

One was a gleaming sword, double-bladed and the edge coming to indefinite point. It rotated in mid air, the hilt made out of shimmering gold. The next was a shield, perfectly round and as wide as Shinji's arm. It was inlaid with crystal clear jewels and gave the sense that it would never be broken. The last one a long, thin rod, a silver star set on the end. Shinji could feel a magical energy emanating from it, one that called to him.

"Yous gots to pick ones of thems there mystical objects to help you alongs yours joiney," the Fairy exclaimed. He pulled out a lawn chain and settled back into it, resting his feet on a barrel he had pulled from nowhere. "But remember, yous can only pick ones. Choose carefully…or whatever. I don't really cares." He made a waving motion with his hands, effectively dismissing Shinji to his job.

Shinji looked at each of the objects. Reasons for each of them ran through his head, convincing him of which to take. He was not a very aggressive person, so the sword probably wasn't a very good choice for him. He didn't really believe in the non-scientific, so the magic rod wouldn't be of any use to him either. Shinji decided on the shield. He'd rather protect someone than attack someone else, and he was always trying to hide his own feelings from others. So it'd be a perfect choice for him.

Satisfied with his decision, he walked up to the altar with the shield and reached for it.

"Yous don't want that ones."

Shinji stopped in mid-grasp. He turned his head towards the fairy, his face a mass of confusion. "Why not?"

"Trust me. Yous don't want that ones."

Shinji thought about it for a while. Well, the Fairy said he shouldn't, and he knew a thing or two about adventuring, being the one that set them in motion and all, so he must have known that picking the shield was the wrong choice. He had no reason to lie to Shinji after all, right? He was supposed to be helping the hero, not hindering him. Shinji smiled and thanked the Fairy for the advice and then walked over to where the magic rod was. Even if he didn't really believe in non-scientific things, how cool would it be to able to wield magic? He could even use it from a distance, so he wouldn't have to worry about getting hit in the first place. Yes, this was the one he should pick! The Prophecy Fairy really knew what he was talking about. Shinji reached out for the magic rod, ready for its energies to run through his body.

"Naw, yous don't want that ones neither."

Shinji looked at him, his face a little less confused and lot more exasperated. "Are you sure?"

"Yous telling me I don't knows what I'ms talking about?"

"N-no, no." Shinji backed down, his spine shriveling up. This was a very common occurrence. Shinji did not excel when it came to confrontation and normally took the easy way out so that the situation did not escalate. He simply thought it was better to concede rather than allow things to end up in violence. He was a pacifist. He did not condone the use of brute force, especially when it involved his face or any of his other easily bruised body parts.

That only left the sword. Shinji supposed it was for the best. He was called too cowardly by those that he knew. Maybe a little aggression would make people like him more. It certainly attracted people to a volatile redhead that he knew. Then again it might have been because those people were well known masochists. But if that was the truth, then what was he for being her closest friend. The ramifications of such thoughts were quickly suppressed so as not to let the trauma utterly destroy his mind.

Life was not kind to Shinji, though, for as he reached for the only artifact that was left to him, he was interrupted again.

"Nuh-uh. Yous don't want that ones at all."

Now, Shinji is a very internal person. He's not one to take things too far even if it means getting into an argument. Sure, he does complain when things do not go his way, but he usually internalizes the problems that he has by going to a corner in the room to sulk or by doing one of his hobbies to help avoid the problem. The day he had cooked up a full course meal for a dozen people resulted from an argument that he had with his father over some inconsequential thing. Trips to the psychiatrist were expensive. A little childhood trauma built character.

But at this point, Shinji's aggravation finally boiled over. His eyes flared, his guts churned, and he said in a commanding voice, "Why noooootttttt?"

"Naw, naw, kid. Here, let me show yous which ones yous want." The fairy got up from his comforting position, setting down his gentlemanly magazine, and walked over to the boy. "Yous want this ones," he said, pointing at the shield.

"But that's the one I picked in the first place!"

"Yeah, but this time yous gets this." He shoved a circular object into Shinji's hands.

He examined it. It was circular, the edges bent inward, and a handle located directly in the middle. The ridged surface was rusted in various places, and it had the distinct stench of spoiled milk. Shinji opened his mouth but the smell forced him to close it, pinch his nose with one hand, and speak through tight lips. "But this is a garbage can lid!"

"Yeah, an' be glad yous gots it." The Fairy grabbed the jewel-encrusted shield and slipped it into his sweatshirt. "A shield like this ain't woirth nothin' in yours hands. I can probably sell it and gets a pretty nice sum with it. Daddy ain't been doin' too wells in the races."

"Can you even do that? Aren't you supposed to be helping the hero?"

"Yous gonna do sometin' about it, kid?" The Fairy stepped in front of him and loomed, rippling with what could have been muscle. His stink-eye bulged from the socket, threatening to spill out. Shinji was scared of the man a few inches shorter than him, scared like only a spineless coward could be. "Yous wanna make somtin' of it?"

"No, no." Shinji furiously shook his head. "I'm just fine with this, really I am! Please don't hurt me…"

The Fairy nodded his head. "That's a good little hero. Nows…" He walked back over to his seat, sat down, and scrounged around for a beer before popping the tab, the foam spilling out all over him. He cursed softly swiping at it. He then grabbed a rope and held it tightly. "It's time for yous to battle the great monsters to prepare for tha' tere joirnry. Ready?" Not giving Shinji time to react, he pulled the rope.

A shadow appeared around Shinji. He looked up. A great mass was falling from high above, waiting to smash him with its definite largeness. It came, faster and faster. Shinji stood there, wondering what he should do. Should he even bother to move? He assumed that he would have to fight some horrific fore, and armed with nothing but a trashcan lid would make the whole endeavor much more difficult than he would hope for. However, being squashed like a bug that was unfortunate to lie the pathway of a human making its way to some unknown destination was not entirely appealing to him either. What would he chose – to fight and suffer some humiliating death, or stay and suffer some humiliating death? Neither one was a choice he wanted to make, but he had to make one or else the choice would be made for him.

Shinji's indecisiveness was a trait inherent to all humans. Such a characteristic often led to unfortunate conclusions such as losing two women at once or having two different types of ice cream melt because one couldn't make a definite decision. In Shinji's case it was having a very large object crush him as he stood there deep in thought, his monologue not important enough to waylay the inevitable force that had to meet him.

Shinji found himself knocked to the floor, trapped under what appeared to be some kind of large animal. Its skin was dry and somewhat flaky and also more than a bit hard. Shinji tried to knock the thing off of him only to discover that it had levitated itself by its own will. He looked up from the floor and scrambled from out beneath the object.

A large rope was attached to the top of the animal, supported by a complex set of pulleys, the end of the rope caught in the Prophecy Fairy's hands. He was reading his magazine again, pulling and pushing the rope every so often. The animal followed suit, twisting on the rope that it hung from.

Shinji had just been crushed by a large, purple, and quite inanimate piñata.

"Are you putting any effort into helping at all here?"

The Fairy shrugged and took a swill from his bear. "Hey, kid, I'm with da Union. We don' have to do woirk." He pulled the rope and wiggled it around. "Look, the creature's tryin'to attack yous. Whack it with yours shield. Save the world, bada-bing, bada-boom."

Shinji growled. He would not let this beer-guzzling, top-skimming, money-stealing jerk make him a fool! He would defeat this ferocious and fearsome party animal and show him that he could be a hero, regardless of how weak and cowardly and stupid he was (and this was something that was said of him on a daily basis.) He summoned the strength held from deep inside of him, and swung the trashcan lid into the piñata's vulnerable side. The area collapsed in an instant. Shinji grinned in triumph and looked at the Fairy.

"Ha! I did it. I defeated the monster! Well, what are you going to do now? Where's my prize?" His voice was confident and steady. He was ready to take on whatever was thrown at him next. The testosterone that had been kept inside his body for so long was released, and he could feel it streaming through his body. Ah…he wanted to hit something with a hammer, to build stuff, to eat lots and lots of red meat. He was a man!

"Eh, don't yous knows anythin', kid?" The Fairy said, his mouth quirked into an amused smirk. "Prophecies never have anything good to thems. All the heroes go throughs bad things. Yous gonna die, kid."

"Huh? What are you talking about?" Shinji turned to the hole in the piñata. The darkness inside began to swirl, faster and faster. His eyes were mesmerized by the sight. So pretty…Shinji didn't even mind when the shadows launched from out of the hole and latched onto his body before dragging him into the void.

Oh, but then came the screams. Seems like he had a delayed reaction.

OTOTOTOTOT

The darkness encapsulated him, wrapping around his arms and legs, suffocating him and it forced its way into his mouth. It was a soft, downy sensation, like that of a comforter bought at the linens store on 3rd Avenue. Oh, wait…

Shinji spit out the corner of the blanket. It was a comforter. Looks like it was nothing more than a dream. Shinji was back in his bed in his room at home in his family's house in Tokyo-3's suburbs. It was a nice place to live – the lawns were kept in neat and tidy order, people fetched the morning paper from the car that delivered them before the sun rose, and not one of the inhabitants of the development had grand disillusions of ruling over the rest of the world in a megalomaniacal fashion via the use of giant bio-humanoid robots. Nope, not a one…

Shinji turned around in his bed, trying to find a more comfortable position. It was a school day but he was sure a few minutes extra sleep wouldn't cause more harm. His hand came in contact with the pleasant warm squishiness of his pillow. He gave it a squeeze. It sighed.

Shinji's brain registered the noise but did not put much evaluation into it. Pillows didn't sigh; that was silly. He nuzzled closer to the pillow, its warmth radiating into his face. Then again pillows weren't this warm either, but it must have been because of his own body heat transferred into it.

By this point it must have come to the attention of the audience that Shinji's thought processes in the realm of early mornings was a bit more sluggish than most people's. This is due to a long family history of low-blood pressure on his mother's side. Before either awakening from or entering long periods of sleep, they would go around in state similar to that of zombie. They couldn't do anything while in this nearly-vegetative state. Or at least that's the excuse Yui always gave Gendo whenever he tried something more intimate. The poor, poor man – defeated by anemia.

Shinji was no exception to the rule, and so he did not react when the pillow started to move, arms began to wind around him, and his face was pushed further into squishy heaven. He certainly didn't react when he heard a girl's voice say to him, "Good morning, Shinji." Well, actually, one part of him did react, a more base part of his physiology that bypassed his higher thought processes and his ability to form cognitive thought. It reacted very happily.

The female voice sounded a bit lighter this time. "It pleases me that you behave towards me like this, Shinji, but it would be best if we wait until your parents left if we wish to continue such actions."

Around the time the girl finished the sentence, Shinji's brain began to come back online and piece together specific parts of his surroundings. Pillows that had a resilience firmer that most, warmth engulfing him that was not his own, a woman wishing him good morning, the same woman saying that would she would do things to him restricted by most family ratings…

Shinji's eyes snapped open. He shot out of the covers to his bed. Greeting him was a young woman around his age. Her light blue hair melted into her pale, alabaster face. This was contrasted by the dark crimson color of her eyes. Her face was without emotion, except for a light tint of red that spread across her cheeks. Her eyes were icy, yet sparkling with life. Her body was slender and smooth, her breasts pert and round, her legs without a mark, her stomach taut. The reason he could see her in such distinct detail was mainly due to the fact that she was completely naked.

Shinji's mouth failed to work about now. It opened and then closed and then opened and then closed and opened again.

He closed it. Then it opened but only a squeak managed to escape from his lips. Shinji's speech abilities were effectively shut down. He employed his motor functions instead, scrambling backwards like a crab, forgetting that from the way that he bed was positioned in the room, he ended up backing straight into the wall. What was even worse, for him at least, was that Rei followed.

She made her way towards him, on hand and knee, her assets waving freely for all to see. Shinji instinctively had his eyes attracted to them, the human eye caught by all motion, no matter how subtle. Rei tilted her head to the side. "Why do you back away, Shinji? Do you not find me pleasing now?" Her knee found its way next to a place very private to him, her hands on either side of his waist, her face dangerously close to hers. Shinji wished that there was some kind of, any kind of, distraction that would take him away from all this.

Humanity has a type of ideology called karma. It states that for when you do good things, good things happen to you in turn. Consequently, when you do bad things, bad things happen to you. Now either Shinji must have been a very bad person in a past life, perhaps a bank robber or murderer or televangelist, or karma is just a load of bunk or someone is just trying to make our miserable lives down here even more miserable than it is psychologically possible. If Shinji had been asked his opinion on it, he would have preferred the former. He could at least rationalize with that the pain he was about to go through in the next few minutes.

The door to his room burst open, a flurry of red and energy in its wake. Red hair that flowed past her shoulders, blue eyes that were as bright as the sky. Her face was a torrent of emotion, a feral joy that spilled into every action she made. Her full lips were in a playful pout, her curved nose shifted slightly up. Her slim legs and arms were seen from outside her school uniform. Her eyes were shimmering with mischief.

"Shinji! Wake up, we're gonna be-"

She saw the pair. Her face changed, reflecting the inner fury that was not carefully masked. Her eyes narrowed, her lips curled into a snarl. Most notable was the way that her fists balled up, the knuckles turning white with the strain put on them. She said her next sentence carefully, enunciating each word so as to alert Shinji to the true severity of his crimes.

"Shinji…No…BAKA!"

This was swiftly followed by punishment of the correct degree for such a crime. In this case – castration without the use of tools.

But we are getting ahead of ourselves. To really understand what has taken place, we must go back in time about ten minutes. We shall situate ourselves inside the Ikari's kitchen, for this is the nucleus of the Ikari family home life.

Sitting at the table is the father, Gendo Ikari. A man entering his mid-life, he seems like a normal person. Brown hair and eyes much like his, with a beard that covered only along his jaw line. He is a serious man but prone to fits of stupidity as well as maniacal laughter. Do not be afraid of this; it is simply his nature. He is currently sitting at the table, reading the daily newspaper before he has to go off to his job. That job is the President of NERV Heavy industries, the most prominent conglomerate in Japan producing wares from military weapons to toilet paper. Gendo liked his job very much, as it was a great way to relieve stress by firing lowly interns whenever he was in a foul mood. This was always countered by Yui's intervention and so Gendo came to be known as the big bad wolf sans any teeth.

The woman at the stove making some quick breakfasts is the mother, Yui Ikari. Her hair and eye color matched her husband's and son's. However, she was a bit prettier than the same two man, luckily for all involved. She's waiting for both Shinji and Rei to get up so that she can get to work as well. Being the head researcher of NERV, her word holds a fair amount of pull as well, nearly as much as Gendo's. In private though, she is much more powerful than her husband and the man knows it. She's jovial and hardworking, but not above smacking her husband when he falls into his temporary delusional states.

They have been living in the house a little after Shinji was born. It is a nice house, two stories tall with a multitude of spacious rooms inside. Their neighbors are the Sohryu's, where the mother Kyoko works for NERV as well. Asuka has been Shinji's childhood friend for quite some time now, ever since they were first introduced by their parents.

Rei originally did not live in the Ikari abode. She first arrived when Shinji was just a child, a distant relative of Yui's whose parents had died in an unfortunate accident. Since then she has been living underneath the same roof as Shinji, something that he founds both pleasing yet abjectly terrifying all at once thanks to her sleeping habits. This shall be explained later as well.

Now that we have given some background on the situation, we shall return to the kitchen. Gendo folded the newspaper in his hands and placed it down on the table. He steepled his hands in front of his face, an action that he frequently used when he wanted to appear dramatic. His voice was low and ominous.

"The door has yet to be opened."

Yui perked up her ears and turned around, her apron swaying with her body. "Hmm? What was that, dear?"

Gendo looked at her, his eyes dark. "I said, the door has yet to be ope-"

"Hi, Mr. and Mrs. Ikari!" Asuka's voice rang out loud, and the sound of the front door slamming shut punctuated the end of her sentence. She bounded into the kitchen, a capricious grin on her face. "Is Shinji up yet?"

"I'm sorry, Asuka," Yui responded. She wiped her hands on her apron to rid them of water. "I'm afraid he's still asleep. Would you mind getting him for me?"

"No, problem, Mrs. Ikari! That idiot would never get to school on time if it wasn't for me!" Asuka beat a fist on her chest, standing up tall.

This has been a tradition ever since they were little. Shinji would refuse to wake up before the sun reached its apex, and Asuka would come waltzing in to lay into him until he did. While it was not beneficial to Shinji, it did gain Asuka the trust of Yui's mother to leave him to her. That was always a plus in her book.

"Thank you, Asuka." She looked at Gendo, who was still frozen in mid-speech, his face disgruntled and annoyed. "Isn't that nice, dear?" Gendo grumbled in reply.

Thrown off a bit by the older man's malcontent attitude, Asuka forced the smile back on her face and nodded to Yui. "Well, I'll be getting Shinji up now!" She ran out of her kitchen, her feet pounding as she ran up the stairs.

Gendo shrugged. "Well, at least there's one more door that has yet to be open."

"BAKA!"

"Never mind." Gendo got up from his chair and walked over to the closet, pulling on his work jacket. "Come along, Yui. We should probably start getting to work." He pulled out another jacket, handing it to the woman as she removed her apron.

"That sounds good." Her face changed as a thought occurred to her. "Oh, but what about Shinji? It sounds like Asuka is angry at him about something." She giggled as she pushed an arm through the sleeve. "He probably has those two fighting over him again."

"Don't worry about Shinji. After all, he's my son."

Yui's smile did not change, but Gendo could feel the air drop a couple degrees. "That's what I'm worried about, Gendo." Gendo, knowing that anymore more would net him a smack or two, resigned himself and trudged out the door. Yui quickly followed, blowing a kiss to the empty hallway.

Now we can officially come back to the present. At the moment Shinji is in dire straits. He has a naked girl on top of him and another, much angrier and violent, girl ready to beat him into a fine paste. So what can he do? What possible action can he take so as to quell the conflict and removed himself from immediate harm? It's actually very simple. Like many animals, Shinji simply cuts all thought and motor functions and shuts down his brain.

He passed out.

Asuka would not allow this. She wanted to exact her revenge upon the misguided boy. Otherwise he would never learn. Jumping onto the bed, she took him by the scruff of the neck and began to vigorously shake him. That would bring him out of unconsciousness. "Wake up you baka so I knock you out again!"

"I do not think that harming him any further will arouse him."

Asuka glared at the blue-haired girl. "Shows what you know! And for the love of God, put on some clothes! What do you think you're doing, Wonder girl, being naked with a pervert like him?"

As mentioned before, Rei's sleeping habits were a bit unusual. She always went to bed without clothes, stating that it felt too confining. She also had the tendency to sneak into Shinji's bed while still in her undressed state. This was one of those days.

Rei tilted her head to the side and looked at Asuka, her face uncertain as to what Asuka was trying to say. "Physical proximity is one of the best ways to show one's affection for another. Being naked only increases the intimacy. I am just using the best weapons available to complete the task assigned."

"Did it ever occur to you that Shinji might not like that?"

"That is irrelevant. Shinji will have to accept me as it is."

"Mein Gott, wonder girl! I thought Shinji was a moron but you're even stupider than he is!" Asuka was in complete disbelief but a thought in the back of her mind said that this conversation was merely par for course. She was distracted when the boy in her hands started to stir.

Shinji's eyes opened. His brain came back online. He had to confirm his surroundings.

The time was morning: check!

A naked Rei in his bed: check!

A very angry Asuka: check!

Reboot confirmed.

Shinji gave a smile, one that was so caring and warm that Asuka and Rei were slightly knocked off guard. Shinji's smiles were worth a lot to them, not to mention half of the girls at school though the two kept them at bay, but it was these specials ones, the ones that spoke almost of transcendence, ones that truly hit them in the heart. Shinji then used this weakness in their defenses to knock Asuka down, vault off the bed, and then run, screaming at the top of his lungs, out of his room. Yet another defense mechanism he had perfected after years of experience.

The two girls sat on his vacated bed. They looked at each other. Rei blinked.

"I believe Shinji is now awake."

"Looks like it," Asuka flexed her fingers. "Now I've gotta go after him. He doesn't have very far to run to in his pajamas."

"Shinji has been known to run outside before with less on than he has now."

"Please, don't remind me." Her face gained a slight tint.

"Understood." Her face matched.

Both were then lost to memories.

"Wanna go chase him down?"

"That sounds enjoyable."

OTOTOTOTOT

The school bell rang clear through the morning air, calling forth the students that ran with all their might not to be late and be punished with cleaning the bathrooms. A mass of uniforms and pounding feet was heard on the streets as they made their way into the gates and onto the school grounds. The education facility loomed over them, waiting to drag their kicking and screaming bodies into its malevolent grasp to wage on them the terrors of Japanese history and Euclidean geometry. Their cries would be heard throughout the day, a warning to those that did not obey the system.

Well, actually this is just an over-exaggeration. School wasn't really all that bad by any means. Sure there was the occasional mental breakdown by one of the teachers or mysterious explosions happening in science labs, but it wasn't anything out of the ordinary. It was a normal school run by a normal super-secret organization to select certain candidates for a certain project. But that is a different story and we are not looking for that story either.

Instead, we shall look at our intrepid trio, who has just made their way onto the school grounds, panting and in various states of mild exhaustion.

Asuka took a deep breath before exhaling it back as a yell.

"Baka! Because we had to chase after you, we almost were late!"

"I don't see how it's my fault that you two had to hunt me down like some kind of animal!"

"But you must admit that as a result of continuously running from us you wasted valuable time that we could have put into walking to school at a more leisurely rate."

"Oh, come on, Rei! Not you too!"

"Ha! See, Shinji? Even wonder girl agrees with me!"

"However, I don't believe it was necessary for you to have tackled Shinji when he tried to run outside."

"He was trying to make a break for it outside without any pants! Pants, that I might add, were taken off when you caught him, o' glorious wonder girl."

"Asuka, stop calling Rei wonder girl! She has a name! And can we please not talk about that? It's embarrassing enough as it is."

"Ho? The baka finally grew a spine? When did that happen, Shinji? Did you eat some testosterone for breakfast?"

"Sohryu, relinquish your hold on Shinji's shirt. It will begin to tear if you hold him up any longer."

"Don't you start ordering me around!"

"Gah…Can't…breathe…"

"Hey, look! It's the newlyweds!"

The trio turned from their position – Asuka holding Shinji up by the scruff of his collar; Shinji dangling, his feet barely touching the ground; and Rei simply standing, her face dispassionate. They saw another trio, one that opposed theirs in boy-to-girl ratio.

One of the boys was tall, had black hair and brown eyes, and was strongly built. His name was Touji Suzuhara. The other boy was around Shinji's height, had brown hair and green eyes, covered by a pair of coke-bottle glasses. His name was Kensuke Aida. They were friends of Shinji. The three of them made up the "Three Stooges" because of their repeated stupid actions, or mostly just the jock and nerd. The girl had brown hairs in ponytails, brown eyes, freckles, and was more plain-looking in comparison to Asuka and Rei. She was a friend to the latter two. Her name is Hikari Horaki.

As to why they barely get any introduction? They're minor characters in the storyline and have no real bearing on it whatsoever. They'll probably disappear within the next couple of chapters only to be reminisced about in some cheesy flash-backs. No one really cares about them.

"Hey!" What'd you say?!" "That's very rude!"

Ignore them. And now, back to the story!

Touji laughed, pointing at Shinji and Asuka. "You guys acting so hot, even this early in the morning?"

Kensuke elbowed Touji. "You can't forget the mistress. She'll make sure things stay cool, but when she and Shinji are alone, things'll get even hotter then." The two laughed even harder at the insinuating joke.

Hikari blushed furiously, her freckles disappearing into the flush. She grabbed both of the boys' ears, tugging harshly. Their faces turned into pained expressions, tears escaping from the corners of her eyes. "That's inappropriate! How could you two make such a vulgar comment?"

"I do not think that Sohryu would make a good mistress," Rei said. "She is too conspicuous when it comes to matters of stealth."

They all agreed to that.

Asuka let go of Shinji, the poor boy falling down to the ground in a lump of limbs and flesh. She turned towards Rei, her eyes burning with anger. "What do you mean I'm the mistress? There's no way in hell I'd settle for the consolation prize!"

"Does that mean you'd rather be the wife? I do not mind if I get a fair amount of time alone with Shinji."

"Who would ever want to marry baka-Shinji?!" she screamed, jabbing a finger in his general direction. "He's the stupidest, most ignorant, cowardly, and weakest boy you could ever have the displeasure of meeting!"

"You're no prize yourself," Shinji muttered, trying to pick himself up from his humbled position. He brushed the dust from his uniform, but most of it still clung to his pressed white dress shirt.

"What was that?!" she screamed at him.

He shot up straight, his arms to his sides, his chin up. "Nothing, ma'am!" It was a conditioned reflex that had been pounded into him ever since he and Asuka had met. He was turning out to be such a good house-trained male.

Asuka sighed. The light in her eyes settled down, and her shoulders lost some of their tension. She walked up to him and sighed heavily. "Honestly, what am I going to do with you? Look, your collar is all crooked and you're full of dust." She began to fix his collar and brush out his shirt. "What would you do without me?"

"But…You're the one that made me look like this in the first place."

"No talking!"

"Yes, ma'am!"

She finished and backed away from him, taking in her accomplishment. His shirt was more or less tidied up. The collar was in place and the dirt had been mostly dusted off of him. His clean appearance contrasted his face, though, which was both haggard and a little bit despairing. He smiled weakly. She smiled back, the ferocity back in her eyes. "Now! What do we say?"

"T-thank you, Asuka…"

"Good boy." She patted him on the head, like master would to his dog. Shinji just sighed in resignation. When would his suffering stop?

He felt a hand land comfortingly on his shoulder. A soft, melodious voice floated in from behind him.

"It's always difficult to deal with those that act in such a barbarous manner, isn't it Shinji?"

The mentioned boy turned around, taking into view another one of his childhood friends. The teen was a considerable deal taller than Shinji. His grey hair went well with his pale skin, one that was about par with Rei's. The two also shared the same eye color, a deep dark red that resembled the tint of blood. His face was mature and beautiful, one that did not fit his age. He smiled at Shinji. "Good morning, Shinji. How are you this morning?" Kaworu Nagisa asked. Another one of Shinji's childhood friends, he met the young boy a little before Rei moved in with Shinji. His smiled widened, strong white teeth flashing in the sun.

The light reflecting from them blinded a student from about a few meters away.

"Oh, god, my eyes!"

This resulted with him slamming into the bike rack and causing a large pile-up including a dozen bikes, five students, and a motorized scooter. The carnage was terrifying. Smoke trailed up into the sky as the refuse burned to oblivion. People ignored it and walked into the school building, finding it less destructive than usual.

Touji leaned over and whispered into Kensuke's ear. "Dude, are they supposed to do that?"

Kensuke raised him camera to record the scene for future reference. "He's a bishonen. They can do whatever they damn well want."

Hikari whispered to them both, her teeth grounded together. "Quiet, you two! You're taking away valuable screen time!"

Shinji smiled back. "I'm fine, Kaworu. And you?" The taller boy's grip on his shoulder tightened. Shinji's eye twitched a bit.

"Hey! Get your perverted hand off him, Nagisa!" Asuka stormed up to the two and swiped Kaworu's hand off of Shinji. She then stood between them, a barrier between an innocent being and a malevolent force. Her arms were crossed in front of her chest, her eyes narrowed, daring him to try something.

Kaworu smirked at Asuka's protective stance. "My, my. Being so violent in the morning, are we, Sohryu?" He raised up both hands to his shoulders, shrugging in a condescending way. "I must admit, your antics are a tad overbearing at times."

Asuka sneered. She tossed her hair over her shoulder and stomped her foot on the ground. "Do you have delusions of being a normal guy or something?"

Kaworu closed his eyes, and moved his hand in front of his face, palm up as though he were calling for something. "Throughout the ages, the vulgar masses have denigrated, even persecuted, that which they have failed to understand." He opened one eye, looking down on Asuka as though she were a bug underneath his foot.

"You damned high and mighty freak!" Asuka's hands balled up into fits, and she made a motion like she was going to punch Kaworu right in his uppity, little nose. Kaworu did not move from the spot, and so Hikari had to grab Asuka and pull her back. This was a bit difficult, though, as Asuka was considerably stronger than the pigtailed girl.

Shinji and Rei stood off to the side. Rei had an emotionless expression on her face. Shinji was laughing softly, a half-amused/half exhausted look on his. Shinji opened his mouth, asking no one in particular. "Why do I feel as though I've heard this conversation before?"

"Recycled ideas by someone who can't come up with their own dialogue."

Shinji turned to Rei, a confused look on him. "What was that?"

Rei just looked ahead at the fight that was slowly dwindling down. "Nothing, Shinji."

The bell rang again, signaling that the students should rush to their respective classes. Shinji and rest perked up their ears, realizing that if they didn't get going, they would be late for homeroom and get punished. That was completely unacceptable to Hikari, who was class representative. So, with a kind and gentle voice, she persuaded the others to move along and enter the school.

"Get your ass to class now or it is grass!"

"Geeze, Hikari needs to mellow out a bit."

"Quiet, peon!"

OTOTOTOTOT

The students filed into their seats, Shinji surrounded by his friends on all sides. Sometimes he found the convenience of it disconcerting at times; at others he thought it was kinda nice. At the moment, with all of them arguing with each other in one fashion or another, he found the whole situation very tiring. He slumped forward in his chair and laid his head face-down on the desk, sighing pitifully.

Rei, who usually avoided conversation like the plague unless it was with Shinji, was the only one free at the time and noticed it. "Is something bothering you, Shinji?"

He smiled gently to assure her and shook his head. "No, there's nothing wrong, Rei. Just a little tired is all."

"I understand." She glanced about, ascertaining as to what it was that was draining Shinji's energy. She was correct in guessing that it was the others who were causing tension that were the origin. She nodded. "Shall I silence them for your benefit?"

Shinji chuckled anxiously. "What do you mean by silence?"

Her response was interrupted by the sound of the door to the classroom opening. In clacked on a pair of high heels, a buxom young woman, her purple hair flowing down to her back. Her deep brown eyes were seeped in mischief, and her ruby-coated lips helped to enhance the mature and adult atmosphere that she gave off. She smiled sultrily and winked at the class, getting an immediate reaction from the male students. She tapped her attendance file on the desk.

"Good morning, class!"

"Good morning, Misato-sensei!" the boys responded.

Misato Katsuragi was an anomaly in the school. She was beautiful, playful, and not afraid to flaunt her looks, a trait not usually associated with school teachers. One could say that she was more fitted to a hostess bar. One could also say that saying that would guarantee a kick to the groin. Misato was not one to be insulted or belittled, as could be described by several of her ex-boyfriends. It was this independence that drew in the teenage boys even more which unfortunately was not something she was trying to do.

"No one absent today? Good?" She crooned, her voice moving around the class like music. "No tardies, either? Wovely!" She said this childishly, making her even cuter in the class's eyes. Although she wasn't trying to get a jailbait boyfriend, she did like to know that she looked pretty to men in their – somewhat early – prime. She giggled, the scent of pheromones visibly wafting from her. "Well, I hope you all have a good day in school today! I'll see you all later!" Misato walked to the door but stopped right after opening it. She turned back to the class.

"Oh, and Shinji?" He blinked when she called on him. "I'll be relying on your services again soon. Be ready!" She blew a kiss and closed the door behind her, waving goodbye.

The entire class looked at the boy as one, their faces a mix of shock, anger, and jealousy. Shinji did not notice them. Instead, the color drained from his face and his eyes gained a glassy look to them. His spine stiffened and a cool chill ran down it. He began to babble incoherently.

"…no more…too dirty…what is that Misato-sensei? What are you doing with that?! No, don't! Aiieee!!!"

The fact that Shinji did not care about the interrogation that was about to be forced on him was understandable. A while ago he had come upon Misato while she going grocery shopping. He had offered to help, being the nice young lad he was, and when he carried her food back – which consisted of nothing but beer and ramen noodles – he came across the most terrifying sight he had ever seen, Misato's apartment. He didn't think it was possible for filth to get into places that it had in the apartment. To someone who cleaned almost as a hobby, Shinji was at a conundrum. Either he could clean a place that could very well kill him in the process, or he could be left with the nagging feeling that he had left a place dirty.

Misato, seeing the unsure look in his eyes, solved the problem for him. One embrace in her exquisite chest, and Shinji found his way back home several hours later and stinking of a woman's scent. Rei and Asuka had some choice words involving a bat and some nails with him when he arrived home.

Shinji was in a catatonic state until the teacher for the next class arrived, something that saved him from lots of embarrassment from the rest of his classmates.

It didn't matter to them. They could always beat/bribe/seduce it out of him later.

The rest of the school day passed rather peacefully. It wasn't until lunch that things broke the still surface of the campus. Shinji was left alone to his devices while Asuka, Rei, and Kaworu had left to go buy lunch, each one very insistent on being the one to buy lunch. He didn't know where the goodwill had come from but it was a welcome surprise. He turned his head when the other members of the group joined him underneath the tree that they all ate lunch under. He greeted them cordially and them in turn. Things went on peacefully until Hikari suddenly spoke up.

"Um, Shinji?" He smiled in recognition. She bit her lip but a glance from Touji urged her on. "Would you mind if we asked you a few…personal questions?"

Shinji blinked at the abruptness of their request. "Sure, guys. I don't mind if you ask me a few questions." He was confused as to what the questions were for but he figured it wouldn't do him any harm to answer them. They weren't exactly going to alter his life, now would they?

Hikari was the first to ask. "What's most important to you?"

Shinji thought about it for a moment. "Hmm…I guess my friends."

"Are friends really all that big a deal?"

Shinji blanched at her response. "Hikari, why would you say something like that? It's not like you."

The girl blushed and began to fidget. Her eyes looked at her lap, unable to make contact with Shinji's. "I…I don't know. I'm sorry, Shinji." The strings from the sadistic puppet master had been severed, leaving only an ashamed little girl.

"Let's forget about that!" Touji suddenly spurted out. He waved his arms to direct attention off of Hikari onto him. Why he did so was unknown…to about three people, not including those in the immediate group. He grinned nervously when they all looked at him with knowing gazes, Hikari's blush deepening even further "Anyway, Shinji! What do you want outta life?"

The smile slipped from his face. "A peaceful life…maybe?"

Touji snorted. "A peaceful life, huh? Hah! What kind of person wants that? Me, I'd want my own harem full of-"

"Touji!" Hikari's blush faded, reverting to a tint that corresponded more with anger than with embarrassment. She smacked the boy upside his head with her hand. "Don't you even think of finishing that sentence, you pervert!"

"Well, ignoring these two," Kensuke said, jerking a thumb at the arguing couple. "The last question is what are you afraid of?" He had his ever present laptop in front of him, inputting the answers that Shinji had been giving

This one was easy for Shinji, and he didn't even have to think before saying it in a low tone of voice. "Being alone."

Kensuke's fingers paused above the keyboard for a moment before typing in the rest of the answer. He entered a few more commands and then snapped the laptop shut. He saluted Shinji and smile. "Well, thanks, Shinji, you've been a lot of help in this."

"What's it for anyway?"

"Oh, don't worry, it's for a very good cause." The spectacled boy answered mysteriously.

Shinji had no idea as to what had just occurred. A small sensation in his gut told him that something bad was going to happen if he didn't take Kensuke's laptop and smash it to pieces right then and there. But Shinji was too nice a person, and he couldn't destroy his friend's stuff without a valid reason. He needed to know if the information he had given was going to be used for an evil purpose. It might save him some misfortune in the future.

Unfortunately for our hero, he's an idiot.

Asuka would agree.

OTOTOTOTOT

"The night is coming, it is inevitable."

The room was dark, lit only by the Tree of Life etched onto the ceiling. Gendo sat at his desk, his hands steepled in front of him as he contemplated what he would do next. His eyes were hidden behind his tinted frames, betraying none of his emotions, none of his actions. He had to think of what to do next carefully, or else it could very well be his last. He looked up at Yui who was seated across from him, smiling gently, her face treacherous in intent.

"Yes, and Shinji has no choice but to enter the darkness."

Gendo grunted. "He will do just fine. He is a strong boy, and he'll know what to do when he has to do it."

"I know that, dear." Yui looked down at her folded hands, studying them meticulously. She understood what her husband meant. Shinji would have to survive through a great deal of grief, much more grief than any boy his age or anybody at all ever should. He was going to go though an amazing metamorphosis, one that would change his very soul and the way that he saw the universe through his eyes. "Do you think that we should have told him about what is going to happen?"

"It wouldn't do any good to tell him. This is not something that we can really prepare him for." Gendo frowned, finding that the situation had started to take a bad turn for him. "We have all that we could for him. You gave him a kind heart. That is something that will be needed for the journey. I showed him the way to make tough decisions when he needed them. That is also something that he will need to know."

Yui nodded sagaciously, rearranging her hand. She sighed. Sometimes it was just so hard to do the right thing, especially when it caused misfortune to another. "We also managed to teach him a bit in the way of fighting. That will especially be necessary in the role that Shinji has."

Gendo grumbled as he put his hands down. He was losing it, he was falling into the pit that had been laid in front of him. An intelligent being was looking at all the angles, setting all the steps that he would eventually take. Gendo was both proud yet annoyed that someone could outmaneuver him so easily. It was a bittersweet feeling. "The Akuma that live in the shadows, the devils that arise from the nightmares."

Yui gathered herself up. "Where will it all lead?"

Gendo shivered, his feelings being let out through his normally impervious shell. He scratched his chest, a sudden case of itchiness running up his torso. "The dawn will signify it all. The sun will be shining down on him, so his journey can be a happy one at least most of the time."

Yui's eyes roved over Gendo, a quirk in the corners of her lips. "But the closer he gets to the light, the bigger his shadow will become." She sighed and stretched, her chest being pushed out. Gendo's glasses flashed for a moment. "But I suppose the only thing he has to remember is that he holds the greatest weapon of all. In that, he can take solace." She moved her hands down to her lap and then picked them up again. "He really is such a kind boy. Too kind for what awaits him."

Gendo nodded, shifting his fingers.

The door to his office opened. A man stepped through, tall and thin like a scarecrow, his grey hair and narrow eyes overflowing with age and wisdom. Kozo Fuyutsuki, Vice President of NERV Heavy Industries, searched for his superior. He knew that interrupting a private conference between him and his wife was not something that would be considered smart, but sometimes he had to take a shot at the smug bastard whenever he could. "President Ikari, there's something in HEART project that needs to be confirmed with you."

"Come back later. I am predisposed at the moment."

"Sir, this cannot wait. You must look over the results that we have gained from the experiments." Fuyutsuki's hand searched for the light switch, as he could see all that well with just the illumination from the Tree of Life.

"You should leave now, Fuyutsuki." His voice left no room for argument.

Fuyutsuki growled, his sneer hidden in the darkness. "Sir, with all due respect, I must insist that…" His fingers found the switch to the room. Satisfied, he flipped it, bathing the entire room in florescent light.

"Oh, God! My eyes! They are blinded!"

He stumbled from the room, his hands clamped over his eyes and mouth. He crawled by grasping at the ceiling, doing his best to refrain himself from vomiting. Such a horrible scene had just been laid out in front of his eyes. Horrors that would kill a lesser man clawed at his soul. He would have nightmares from it, infecting his every waking and non-waking thought. He needed to get to the psychiatrist. He had to have these images burned onto his retina purged from his psyche! Fuyutsuki stumbled, one step closer to just collapsing on the floor.

Gendo and Yui sat there, holding cards in both of their hands. Yui had a bewildered expression on her face, her NERV uniform clean and tidy. Gendo was frowning, his NERV uniform in Yui's lap. He was clothed in nothing but his boxers, socks, and shoes. He snorted and turned back to Yui. She shrugged, not understanding Fuyutsuki's reaction.

Hadn't he ever played Strip Poker before?

OTOTOTOTOT

The music floated lazily through the air of the classroom, moving up and down like a leaf on the summer breeze. It was smooth and melodious, a harmony that could soothe the most savage of beasts, and had more on one occasion prevented Asuka from going on one of her destructive rampages. It was a wonderful sound, calming and pregnant with the beauty of nature. The window was open, letting the warm wind of spring come in and wrap itself around the two people that were strumming along peacefully on their instruments.

Kaworu and Shinji had stayed after school, practicing on the school instruments that were kept in the school's string instrument clubroom. At first Asuka and Rei had been adamant about him staying behind, both in their own particular ways – Asuka acting passive-aggressively while Rei simply stared at him as though he had betrayed them, but Shinji managed to convince them by saying that if he didn't practice enough, his skills would get rusty. Kaworu backed him up, insinuating that perhaps the girls were trying to sabotage Shinji's only real hobby.

Guilt is an odd concept. It can be used to show people that what they did before might have been wrong, and persuade them to rectify the situation and alleviate the guilt. However, like all human concepts, it can be abused and control people if they have even the littlest amount of guilt inside of them even if its not connected to the crime that's being mentioned. It is quite common for a person to bring up a past slight of someone and use it as leverage so that the guilty person will do something that they want. Kaworu was one of these people, had the innate ability to bring up anybody's guilt or flaws and render them to his own uses. The boy was smart in human interaction, no doubt about that. The things he could do to influence people's actions were astounding.

Back to the case in point. His words effectively shut Rei and Asuka up, the two not wanting to isolate Shinji. Kaworu could really manipulate people if he wanted to, and he was using his ability to the full extent that he could, if it meant that he could get some time with Shinji to himself. Poor Shinji, the boy was popularly and he barely realized it.

Kaworu was standing by the window, a violin carefully held between his hand and chin. His eyes were closed, his mouth set into a small smile. His hands flowed across the strings with the stick, creating a miraculous sound.

Shinji sat in the chair next to him. The cello he was playing was carefully leaned against the front of him. His eyes were closed as well, but his mouth had formed into a thin line from the amount of concentration he was putting into playing the instrument. His hands held the same fluidity as Kaoru's, moving along the cello as though it were an extension of his body. As he continued to play, a loud screeching noise emanated from the instrument.

The two were forced to cover their ears. When they removed them, Shinji smiled apologetically. "Sorry, guess I messed up a bit, huh?"

Kaworu shook his head. He placed the violin carefully on one of the desks in the room and turned back to Shinji. "Do not worry about it. The strings on that cello are getting a bit old aren't they? That may have been a reason."

"I guess," Shinji murmured. "But it also shows that I need to work on it harder." He set the cello down, leaning it against the wall. He stretched his body, his arms and hands sore from having to hold the large instrument in place for so long.

Kaworu pursed his lips. He turned and walked up to the window. He leaned on it, his hair blowing with the breeze that came in. His face was pensive, his eyebrows knotted in deep thought. Shinji just watched him, wondering what his friend was thinking about. After a few minutes of silence, Kaworu spoke.

"Shinji, what do you think is out there?"

"Huh?" Shinji got up from the chair and moved over to Kaworu's position. He leaned backwards on the windowsill and looked at him. "What do you mean by that?" His expression agreed with him.

"What do you think is beyond our boundaries?"

"The school grounds?"

"Farther than that?"

"That housing development?"

"No, beyond that."

"The highway?"

"No, Shinji. Even farther than that."

"The next prefecture?"

"Farther…than…that!"

"Are you talking about outside the country?"

Kaworu's face had degenerated into one of pure annoyance and exasperation. His once clever eyes were now dull, and his good-humored smile had turned into an agitated frown. He sighed and rested his head on the windowsill. Looking at Shinji, he made a strained smile and talked in a way that an adult would to a child. "It's a good thing you're cute, Shinji, or else you would be ignored faster than dung at a flower contest."

"Ummm, thank you?" Shinji did not know how to take the statement as evident from the confused expression he held. There were times that he really did not know what Kaworu was trying to say as the boy was much more mysterious and quick-witted than the average teen. But he could tell that his childhood friend had been putting lot of thought into what he was trying to share with Shinji, and Shinji was not going to let his attempts end with recourse.

He smiled lopsidedly. "Sorry, I'm trying to understand what you're saying but it's just not coming through."

Kaworu looked at Shinji, shook his head, and then smiled again, but this time it was one of his much more genuine ones. "Don't worry about it, Shinji. There are times when people cannot communicate with each. It is a basic principle of life." He leaned farther against the window, his eyes capturing the afternoon sky. "Just think about it. There are worlds out there that we have never seen, and may very well never see. I simply want to discover those worlds and explore them, find what kind of differences they have with ours and learn new information in the process." He sighed. "Doesn't that sound like an intriguing thought?"

Though Shinji still could not fully understand what Kaoru was trying to say to him, the basic gist of the explanation got to him. It struck him in the heart, an emotion that he had never quite felt before – a lust for adventure. He chuckled. "That actually sounds pretty fun, Kaworu."

Kaworu looked at him, Shinji's face with the wonder only an innocent child could have. "Would you want to come with me, Shinji?"

"Huh?" Shinji looked at Kaworu. His eyes were glimmering with an unknown aspect. Shinji smiled. "Sure! That would be great! But, oh…" He looked down, his features troubled. Kaworu tilted his head, wondering as to what Shinji was thinking about.. Shinji returned his gaze to Kaworu, sheepishness in his smile. "Could Asuka and Rei and the others come, too? I'm sure they would enjoy it as well."

Kaworu's eyes widened. A flash of disappointment ran through his thoughts before he banished it to the back of his mind. He knew Shinji would be much happier if he could share his joys with others. It was simply one of the many aspects that drew the grey-haired youth to the boy. His lips melted into a curved smile. "I'm sure they would, Shinji. I'm quite sure they would."

The two became silent as they watched the sky begin to turn red and orange as the sun started to set beyond the horizon. The twilight set in, and all was bathed in a haze of light and darkness. The land was quiet, approaching the time for slumber.

It was getting very dark out after all.

Humans wish to always go beyond the boundaries that were assigned to them. It is simply something set into their genetic code at birth, a thought lodged in their psyches to forge through the safe haven that they were born in. It is not something that can be extinguished easily, and it is more often than not the seed for young men and women to venture out into the unknown, braving all that awaits them. But as we mentioned before, this is not your typical adventure story. Oh no…This story is very different.

In this story, it's the boundaries that invade, and not the other way around.

What? You say that is also a very common archetypal plot line?

Hmph, well, shows what you know. This story is still different, but no more shall be said else we'd ruin the plot. You must simply wait until the next part comes along, in which everything will be explained.

Do try to be patient until then. It is a most amusing and amazing story.

Or at least that it what we were told.

A/N: Okay, well that's the end of the fanfic. To those who recognize some of the more obscure jokes, I salute you. This was written in a "theatre of the absurd" manner, quite similar to the writings of Douglass Adams, the genius who wrote "The Hitchhiker's Guide to the Galaxy" series. Salute him as well. Expect all kinds of silliness in this fic. As an added bonus, I'll be doing omakes every once in a while, usually at the end of each anime arc. Send in your omakes to my e-mail that involves the plot, Evangelion, or Kingdom Hearts in some way, and I'll do my best to put them in. Heaven knows they'll be better than the crap I'll be putting out. Well, see ya in the next chapter. Please review, and remember, no flames!

_Next Chapter Preview!_

Asuka: Shinji! What the hell is going on here?!

Shinji: I don't know, Asuka! These weird shadow creatures just came out of nowhere and began attacking the city! Huh? What do you mean Akuma? And what's this keyblade?

Asuka: You're trying to say that Shinji is the chosen hero?! Mein Gott! We're all going to die!

Rei: You must walk the razor's narrow edge, Shinji, without veering from your path.

Kaworu: Shinji, come with me. The other worlds are waiting for us.

Shinji: Kaworu?! Where are you going? Will someone tell me what we're supposed to do?

Asuka: Get off you butt, baka! We've got worlds to save!

Rei: Next time on Organization XVIII – Apocalyptic World (or) Gee, It Was Never This Dark Before.

Shinji: I mustn't run away, I mustn't run away, I mustn't run away.

Asuka: Scheiße, we're completely screwed…


	2. Apocalyptic World

A/N: Well, here comes the next chapter of my EVA/KH crossover. It still takes place in the AU universe so…yeah. Hopefully more people will like it and review this time…but I'm not expecting much. It is my first fic in a new fandom and it's been a while since the last one so I really shouldn't expect a lot. But before we get onto the story let me answer a few questions and/or comments my reviewers left.

**Alex Ikari:** Thanks for mentioning the things you found enjoyable. As for the harem, that's a bit of a toss-up. The "main" one is definitely Asuka/Rei, but there will be a lot more what with all the worlds they'll be traveling across. Expect "mega harems." I do this mainly for fun and also to spoof the other harems found in various other EVA fics. And I actually give a _reason_ for them, though now for a while.

**Himonky:** I did clichés on purpose. That's the point of this story, it's a spoof. Also, I am trying to mix more serious parts along with the humor, as you'll see particularly in this chapter. Also, yay! This chapter is shorter! ...sort-of.

**Hamstadi:** Spoof, spoof, spoof. Ironically though, I wrote the script for this _before_ I read "Everydays," which is a very good fic regardless. However, I think the style is easy to emulate considering the more insane, less depressing point of the situation. Or I'm just blowing it out my ass, eh.

Thank you to the rest of my reviewers!

Disclaimer: I do not own either Evangelion or Kingdom Hearts. I'll say what other series I don't own as they come up. That way I won't have to waste space with a dumb disclaimer.

**Organization XVIII  
Chapter 2: Apocalyptic World (or) Gee, It Was Never This Dark Before  
By Irritus185**

As a famous, fictional, all-too-adorable, quote/one-liner spewing movie retard once said, "Life is like a box of chocolates. You never know what you might get." However, the author disagrees with this sentiment and philosophy. He instead believes that life is like a watch.

It's got all kinds of shiny metal parts and gears and sproingy things and people are always arguing whether digital or analog is better and when it stops working you just want to take it and begin to bash it with something because you're between wanting to just utterly destroy it or have a skewed notion that smacking it like the family room TV will make it start working again.

…

Okay, so maybe life isn't so much like a watch after all – except for the bashing something to pieces part. That appears to be a concept all too common to all forms of life.

Shinji was feeling like that at this one particular moment. He had a problem he wanted to solve, and he was wracking his brains to figure out the right way to go through the equation and come up with a satisfactory answer.

The problem had two variables. One was a beautiful girl that was sometimes naked, sometimes in bed with him, and oftentimes performing both actions at once. The other was a beautiful girl that always took the time to come over and wake him up so that he wouldn't be late for school but oftentimes beat him back into unconsciousness so that he missed school or was late for it anyway.

Now normally adding one beautiful girl to one beautiful girl would logically make a very happy Shinji, or perhaps an even hotter girl with penchant to nudity and S&M tendencies if you threw quantum physics into the equation. However, considering that this is not mathematics and more of a psychology dilemma, Shinji was unfortunately receiving a continual lecture in pain and humility. So what could he possibly do to relieve such anxieties?

Shinji thought hard and long all day and night and came up with the solution.

If constant A (Shinji) plus variable B (Rei) plus variable C (Asuka) equaled ouchies and booboos then removing constant A (Shinji) would remove the ouchies and booboos factor. Yes! He _knew_ those long, tedious hours in algebra would amount to something!

So he made his plans and waited for bedtime to come about. His plan was igneous, well-thought out, and ready for any discrepancies to occur.

First he would create a dummy, creatively made of a rolled up blanket, a wig, and some makeup for good measures. Then he would sneak downstairs, making sure that anyone down there would see him heading back upstairs to show that he was going to his room.

But he wouldn't go to his room, no he wouldn't! He would slip into the hall bathroom, climb out the window, navigate the treacherous way to the roof, and find the blanket and pillow he had laid out earlier waiting for him.

It was brilliant! It was genius! It could not fail!

Shinji smiled widely as he imagined the gentle and quiet wake-up that he always dreamed of.

And so, the boy woke up the next morning, sans a naked Rei clinging to him, sans an angry and jealous Asuka yelling at him, and completely soaked to the bone as there had been a large and brutal rain shower the night before.

But at least he didn't have ouchies or booboos.

OTOTOTOTOT

"Ahhh-CHOO!"

Asuka glanced at the boy, her features a mix of concern, disgust, and amusement. He was hunched over slightly, wiping at his nose with the back of his hand. His eyes were slightly baggy and his cheeks fairly flushed. All together Shinji looked a whole lot of miserable with some crappy tossed on the side for good measure. She sighed and fished for a second in her pocket, pulling out a polka-dotted handkerchief. She offered it to him silently.

He smiled and accepted it gratefully. He held it up to his nose and blew noisily, earning a flinch from the redhead in return. "Thanks, Asuka," he muttered nasally.

She snorted. "Honestly, you immense idiot. What the heck were you thinking, getting soaked like that?"

"To my understanding he did it so that he would avoid the conflict that normally occurs in the morning between the three of us." Rei added in her own two cents. She was obviously worried about him as well, he eyes a bit brighter and her face a bit softer than it normally was. "Though I must admit it was flawed in many areas."

"_I_ thought it was a smart idea."

"And look where it got you! You should the thinking up to me, Shinji. It's obviously not your forte."

Shinji shivered and glanced at the girl in defiance. "Says the person who still has trouble reading and writing our language even though she's lived here for most of her life."

He was still frustrated and grumpy from the failure of his plan, and the double team of both Asuka and Rei rubbing it in did help to calm his emotions. Normally the redhead and azurehead didn't agree on much, much like the colors that represented them. Asuka was fiery and rushed into confrontations without thought, relying on her wit, skills, and brutal strength to get her through unharmed. Rei, on the other hand, approached the situation much more calmly and passively, meticulously calculating what would need to happen to secure an airtight victory.

This was not at all cheap foreshadowing of the author's doing.

Shinji vaguely heard disturbing laughter echoing in the recesses of his thoughts. He shook his head.

However, when it came to him, they often threw away their…creative differences to make a united front. When Shinji was involved, all else would be cast to the side to utterly make his life as controlled as possible. With two conniving females against his own feeble male mind, the poor boy did not stand a chance. He also would have had even less probability of even surviving had he even _thought_ of voicing his conception of the "conniving females."

For that matter the author as well.

Asuka blinked, her mouth setting into a pout and her cheeks gaining a light red tint. She did not appreciate the low blow her childhood friend had directed at her. "Kanji is _hard!_ Besides, I still get better grades than _you_, baka! Best of the class in fact."

"Yeah, yeah."

"Shinji, are you bothered? Your attitude suggests that your emotional status is less than satisfactory." Rei shifted her head the slightest towards Shinji, catching Asuka's eyes at the same time.

"Gee, Rei, how'd you notice that? Your observational skills must be great to notice something so small." Shinji suddenly stopped as twin looks of surprises appeared on Asuka's and Rei's faces. Shinji never, _never_ snapped at Rei. It was something that he reserved for Asuka, a banter between the two that had been cultivated and nurtured over years of arguments and fights. Rei was always someone he spoke more in a passive manner with. It suited the soft-spoken duo better.

Shinji paused for a moment, staring down at his feet. What was wrong with him? Lately he had felt so bothered, so out of place. That dream the day before, the one that he had managed to gather bits and pieces of, had been so strange and unnerving. Despite the fact that it was more akin to the result of bad food-poisoning, not that there's such a thing as good food-poisoning but depending on the hallucinations accompanying it can go either way (Gundams in frilly pick aprons battling in an Iron Cook-off are a bit of a toss-up between the simply bizarre and the hilarious), there was still something about the dream that had burrowed around in his brain.

Of course, this set off numerous amounts of meta-alarms in his mind, reminding him that it was like a bad cliché of a plot from a manga or video game. But what kind weirdo based their ideas for a reality off something like those (certain fanfiction authors notwithstanding)?

Shinji was a lot of things, but someone who purposefully went out of their way to create tension he was not. The kind he made with Asuka was a different story, as it usually ended very quickly with him either eating some inanimate object or some other action detrimental to his health. Thus it affected no one but him, except for the times when Touji and Kensuke were involved and that ended with a whole lot of crying, high pitched solos, and sorely stretched fabric. But the kind that had larger implications, the kind with world-shattering consequences, was not something he enjoyed and would rather avoid less he be dragged in.

Once again, cue ominous laughter.

Shinji rattled his head lightly. That was starting to get annoying.

He finally looked up from the ground and back at the two girls. Each flanked his side, the trio lodged in a busy sidewalk down the main avenue of the prefectures marketplace. Various people maneuvered around them, ignoring them as they had more important things to, signified by the fancy watches on their wrists that told the time and date and place and ambient temperature and stopped working and why was it not working and did he have to smash it to a million pieces to – ARGH!

Shinji, Asuka, and Rei looked nervously at the businessman raving about cheap, counterfeit watches and seedy sellers and why did this stuff always happen to him, and slowly decided they should move away from the whole scene. They began walking faster than before to try to make up for the time lost when they had stopped.

He tried a flimsy smile. "Sorry, Rei. I didn't mean to talk like that."

She nodded, her crimson eyes never straying from his cobalt blue ones. "That is alright. I understand you are troubled at times. Is it because of back-up that you are currently on edge? I know that it must be hard to release yourself with me always around." She put a finger to her chin and looked up pensively. "Or does that just make it easier?"

Shinji appeared utterly confused by her statement. Asuka, catching upon the indirect meaning quickly, elbowed Shinji in the ribs and leered suggestively. "Really, baka-boy? A pervert like you worried about someone catching you in your throes of passion? I'd think wondergirl was right and you'd be looking _forward_ for someone to see you."

Shinji's face screwed up even more before realization finally dawned on his face immediately followed by disgust and embarrassment. Ah, takes a while for him to catch on things, doesn't he? Such a naïve little bugger.

"You guys are perverted!"

Rather childish, too.

Asuka cackled wildly, sparing another glance at Rei. "That was good, wondergirl. I didn't think you had it in you to tease baka-Shinji here."

"I wasn't teasing him. I was honestly interested if he had a physiological ailment and if it needed to be cured." She turned her head and looked at Shinji, her apathetic expression remaining perfectly straight. "Do you require any help for that matter, Shinji? I would be happy to offer my assistance if so."

Both Shinji and Asuka stopped at that point, their faces equaling an 8.6 on the AEM.

_The AEM is short for Anime Embarrassment Meter. An ingenious tool created by a young anime viewing crackpot with both way too much pocky and time on his hands (of course the creator was guy; you expect a girl to be stupid enough to create crap like this?; oh, wait, disregard that notion). The scale runs through a variety of factors but mainly settles on the point of what type of embarrassment is being displayed (sexual, old family photos, personal hygiene) as well as the type of anime and character the embarrassing moment is being made in and from. A 1 on the meter equates to a snoring problem. A 5 is when you finally stop wetting the bed after graduation…of your high-school. Anything over 7 usually starts to form irreversible hemorrhaging in the face and brain and is considered very rare. What these two delightful characters have just achieved has probably led to the destruction of all childhood memories spanning over several months. Say goodbye to Christmas, kiddies._

Asuka was the first to regain motor control after being poleaxed by that comment. "Wondergirl, you blue-haired _freak!_ I _knew_ you were kinky like that when you crawl into Shinji's bed every night!" She didn't even look back at Shinji, nor did she fail to keep her voice down and thus regale her friends' nighttime habits to the entire marketplace. Ooo…the Ikari household was going to receive a few calls from the neighborhood association for that one. "Shinji, aren't you going to say anything?!"

Shinji at the moment was decisively _not_ paying attention to his surroundings. Instead he was lost in the realm of fantasy where he was enjoying the company of a barely morally dressed Rei as well as a penguin, some horseshoes, and some several tons of other various objects not meant for the proceeding actions when people thought of them.

"But I don't _like_ whipped cream."

Oh, wait, that was _always_ meant for that reason.

Asuka apparently didn't like whipped cream either, except for when it was on her ice cream and not on the _other_ icy, rainbow-colored body. Besides, what was wrong with strawberry? It was a perfectly good flavor. Blueberry was just too…

And now we are getting away from the situation in hand and shall stop before even more repressed feelings are brought to light. Shinji still has to survive long enough for the story to actually get good.

Unfortunately, the fist locked onto his skull after that gregarious comment did not agree with the previous sentiment. Shinji soon found himself smashed into a dark alleyway, something that was not at all foreboding.

"See you got in a fight with the little cutie there huh, kid?"

Shinji looked up to see a being cloaked in shadows offer him a hand. The figure chuckled at his wariness to accept. "Don't worry, I'm not about to do anything. I don't feel like being assaulted by either of your friends." It jerked its head in the direction Shinji had flown in from. He saw that Asuka was in a one-way shouting contest with Rei, the quieter girl answering…not so loudly.

Shinji stilled seemed unsure. The figure sighed. "All right. If I stop acting so mysterious, will you believe me?" A small nod was his answer. "Fine…"

The figure stepped out, revealing an average height male decked out in black, baggy cargo pants and a black sweatshirt that hung below his waist halfway to his knees. His messy brown hair fell over his eyes, a swirling mass of colors that was slightly obscured by a set of thin, rectangular glasses.

"Am I on the money now?"

Shinji blinked at the man's seemingly bored and apathetic attitude. It was almost like looking at a male version of Rei. That by itself was visually disturbing enough but there was one more thing that was bothering Shinji, an idea on the very boundaries of his mind before it expressed itself via him sticking a foot in his mouth rather than out.

"I don't trust people wearing hoodies."

The man nodded his head. "Ah…good point, good point. Yeah, they're not very trustworthy people. Hate that Prophecy Fairy. Damn Union ruins pretty much everything it touches. That's why I like being a self-employed kind of guy."

Shinji nodded in agreement and then froze halfway through. His face settled on shock and the pit of his stomach felt like someone had slapped several gallons of seltzer water in it. It was really rather cold. "Wait. How do you know about that? I never-"

"Oh?" The man rolled his eyes up, a thin smile curling up his lips. "I know everything, especially you…Ikari Shinji."

That cold feeling shifted from his stomach to up his spine, effectively paralyzing the poor boy. He wanted to back up but found that he couldn't. How did this man know who he was? Was he some kind of stalker? Was he going to kill him and then gut his body to sell his organs on the black market? Or maybe stuff him and use him as a decorative piece for his den? Or maybe kidnap him and then hunt him down as the world's most dangerous prey? Or maybe…

"Jeeze, kid, you've been reading too many creepy books." Shinji looked up at him, his eyes wide as he wondered how the man had heard what he was thinking…before realizing he had been almost screaming the spew to anyone within earshot. Why no one outside the alleyway couldn't hear it was beyond him.

"Writer's convenience. Anyway, do I look like the type of guy who would do something like that?" He paused as Shinji glared at him in disbelief. "Right, creepy guy in an alleyway who you've never met before but supposedly knows everything about you. Never mind, don't answer that. On to more important matters…" He cupped one hand, pounding it with a fist made with the other. Shinji took this as his sign to press his questioning.

"What do you want with me?"

"Your soul."

"What?!"

"Wait, sorry, sorry. That came out wrong. Hey, wait, you can't run away!" He sighed as Shinji took off with a puff of dust trailing behind him. "Why do they always run when I tell them that? Oh, right…archetypes" He snapped his fingers.

Shinji could see himself reaching for the light – almost there, almost there. What he failed to notice was that with every step his shadow became invariable longer. Just as he was about to step out into the street dark hands exploded from the ground, grabbing his legs. Another set covered his mouth, making it so that he couldn't scream. More and more hands appeared, dragging him back into the alleyway and plastering him to the wall. The man nodded.

"There. Now you can't run away." Shinji glared at him, half-defiant and half-piss-his-pants scared. "Look, if I let go of your mouth can we have a peaceful conversation? I promise that I won't do anything to hurt you. I just want to talk." Shinji did nothing for a few moments and then slowly nodded. The man smiled. "Good." He snapped his fingers again and the hands covering Shinji's mouth vanished back into the shadows. "Now, back to what I was saying, I want your soul."

"You just said you didn't mean that."

"I lied. Well, not really. I don't want your _soul_, I have no real use for that. I mean, honestly, what am I gonna use a soul for? They're not a common currency, and they're ghastly decorations unless you're into that whole Faust and Mephisto crap. What I want is what your soul can do. You have a rather interesting character, Shinji, one that intrigues me to no bounds. And because of that, I want to use you for something."

"And that is…"

"To open a door. And through that door is a quite amazing adventure. Danger, perils, humor, and if you're lucky maybe even a little lovin'." He winked suggestively at this.

"What if I don't want to?"

"Oh, it's too late for that. That dream you had? That means the adventure's already started. It's too late to turn back now, I made quite sure of it."

Shinji's eyes opened wide. "You what?! But why?!"

"Because I was bored," he said, his face stating that it was the most obvious thing in the world. "And like I said, you _interest_ me. I think you make quite the perfect choice for this job."

"But I…"

"Look, kid." The man poked him in the chest, his face strangely serious. "The game has started. It won't finish until _you_ end it. Those that are close to you, those that are precious, they are all pieces in that game. If you run away, they will disappear, and you will never see them again. The darkness is moving and it is consuming the weakness everyone has inside. Including those close to you."

Shinji froze. Those…close to him would disappear. That was…that was…Wait, would that mean he wouldn't have to worry about all the crap he went through on a daily basis? Because that didn't sound half-bad actually. To be honest, it would be nice to go a day without Rei sleeping with him or Asuka laughing at him or Kaoru acting all elitist or father stoically ignoring him or mother being all silly and fussing over him or Touji and Kensuke thinking up some cockamamie plot or Hikari yelling for them all to be proper…

And…And…

"And it will all be gone. Everything."

Shinji closed his eyes. Then he opened them.

"What can I do?"

The man smiled. "You have a special power, Shinji. It forms the shape of your soul. Whether it is strong or weak, good or evil is all up to you. The darkness consumes and the light is what ultimately destroys that darkness but creates it, too. Not everything is what it seems and not everything will be clear to you, even over the endless drifts of time." He poked the boy in the chest, grinning in amusement. "As clichéd and corny as it sounds, your heart is your greatest weapon. Use it, be guided by it, and never let it be taken over. You can't run away, Ikari Shinji, you have to keep walking forward."

He snapped his fingers. The hands melted away, falling back into the shadows they had been birthed from. Shinji rubbed his arms, trying to regain feeling and rid himself of the pins-and-needles. He looked at the man, his rainbow eyes whirling like a kaleidoscope. Shinji felt dizzy and had to look away, that choppy feeling of nausea filling his stomach. Something slammed on his back, and Shinji stumbled a few steps forward. He looked behind.

The man smiled and waved his fingers. "You better get going. Those cuties are probably waiting for you."

Shinji nodded and started walking forward. However, something clicked in his mind, and he turned around to say something. "Hey, what's your nam-"

There was nothing. Only shadows.

Shinji shivered. Then warmth collected on his shoulder. He looked over his shoulder. Asuka was scowling at him. "Hey, Shinji! What are you doing?! We're going to be late!"

Another warmth, this time on the opposite arm. Rei was looking at him carefully. "We must hurry."

Shinji shakily nodded his head. "Y-yeah, sure." He took one last look at the alleyway before racing after Asuka and Rei.

The shadows did nothing. The light shifted. The shadows stirred.

Cue ominous music. The laughter just won't cut it this time.

OTOTOTOTOT

Lunch had come around again, like it always did. Once again, the entire group had gathered together, conversing with each other about nothing in particular. Asuka and Hikari tried to bring Rei into a chat about the latest clothes designs and other new fads. Kensuke and Touji screwed around with each other, producing one lame joke after the other to see who would break first. Kaoru just ate lunch silently, thinking on matters foreign to someone around his age. And Shinji thought about his meeting with the strange cloaked man about the supposed inevitable death of the world as he knew it and everyone that he held dear to his heart.

Wait, back up a moment. What?

Shinji munched on his bento, taking slow, absent bites. His thoughts were whirling back and forth, too fast for him to even try and understand. The darkness was consuming? The weakness in people would lead to their destruction? And he was the only one that was able to stop it? With his soul?

The more Shinji thought on the matter, the more obvious the outcome became. There were either two answers to the questions that were burning inside his brain.

One, the entire conversation he had had with the strange man had been a hallucination cooked up by his fevered brain which was the result of one too many hits to the head and gradual explanation to his soon-to-be obvious insanity.

Two, everything that had happened had been real, the man was right, the world was ending, Shinji was its only hope left…and everything (both including and surrounding the concept of existence) was completely, definitely, and utterly screwed.

Neither were options he was particularly enjoying but if he had to pick one then most likely he would rather have option A.

After all, a personal touch of insanity was always better than the end of all existence. He had heard the mental institutions had such cushy, white rooms…

A sense of despair filled itself into Shinji's stomach again. Unfortunately this time it had to do with something that was completely different from his current train of thought. Once again he would come to regret not invading Kensuke's personal space and smashing his laptop to itty bitty electronic pieces.

An array of covered stacks was sitting next to Kensuke's side, cleverly hidden by the tree and his body. Upon deciding that the time was right he nodded to Touji and tapped Hikari on the shoulder. In a matter of minutes the three had set up a table, conveniently taken from nowhere, and Kensuke had stepped in front of the table, a megaphone that had appeared from the same unknown space as the table in his hands. The rest of the group watched in interest as Kensuke then raised the megaphone up, licked his lips, and spoke in a loud booming voice. Consequently it might have been better if he had moved away a little bit as the others had a ringing tone in their ears some time after that.

"AND NOW THE MOMENT YOU'VE ALL BEEN WAITING FOR! WE BRING YOU THE ULTIMATE SOURCE OF INFORMATION ON THAT DEVLISH LAD, THAT INTROVERTED SCOUNDRAL, THE MAN WHO HAS TAKEN THIS SCHOOL BY STORM! WE BRING YOU, THE ONE AND ONLY, **IKARI SHINJI ALMANAC!**"

There was a moment of silence…and then came a stampede of people, screaming and waving yen bills like a gang of cheap strippers had found their way onto school grounds. Shinji, Asuka, Rei, and Kaoru had to jump out of the way to avoid being trampled upon. Then, the first one to break out of his stupefied senses, Shinji sprung to his feet and shot over to Kensuke who was busy looking over the stock of heavily bound magazines as Touji and Hikari furiously attended to customers.

"Kensuke!" the boy screeched. "What the hell is this?!"

"What does it look like?" The spectacled lad pushed his lenses up, a gesture that creepily reflected one performed by Shinji's father. "We're selling books and articles on you."

His eyes bulged out. "But why?!" He found himself saying that a lot today.

"Isn't it obvious?" Shinji stared at him blankly. Kensuke sighed and looped an arm around his shoulder. "Shinji, my dear, dear friend. You're almost like a legend at this school. Your parents are the leaders of one of the biggest conglomerates in Japan, you have two of the hottest girls in school either after you or already owning you, you and Kaoru are considered the cutest seme and uke couple by all the girls in school, not to mention half of them are after you on their own, you've managed to garner the attention of our beloved Misato-sensei, and you are very, _very_ photogenic. Need I say any more?"

Shinji blinked before blushing deeply. "Where the hell did you get all that from?! Asuka and Rei are just friends, my parents should have nothing to do with me, I just helped out Misato-sensei because I met her at the right time and place, and Kaoru is…" His eyes narrowed and brows sank in confusion. "Wait, what's a seme and uke?"

Kensuke laughed anxiously. "Er…disregard that last one. Anyway…we're making a killing off of this! You have no idea how profitable you are right now! It's like a goldmine just waiting to be dug up! Here, just look!" Kensuke handed Shinji a copy of the magazine.

Shinji was staring at a picture of himself. In it he was sitting against a tree, sleeping, with the wind blowing gently in the background. Superimposed on the cover were the words "Ikari Shinji Almanac." His mind was already running in circles that the thing existed at all, so it was with great trepidation that he began to leaf through the magazine. There was the basic stuff – birthday, weight, height, his hobbies, his likes, dislikes, those questions that the three had asked him the day before, pictures of him wearing nothing but a-

"When did you take _this_ picture?!"

Once again, Kensuke laughed nervously. "Heh, remember that time when your parents were out and we all got together and had that big party and you got completely wasted off you-"

"You got me drunk so you could take pictures of me in cosplay?!"

"Now, now, it's all good, tasteful fun."

"It's voyeurism!"

"It's only voyeurism if you get caught."

"I'm only wearing an _apron_ in this picture!"

"KYAAAAAAH!"

The two looked over to see a group of girls shrieking and blushing madly, crowded around a single girl with one of the almanacs open. Kensuke pointed at them. "So they've seen."

"Kensuke!"

"Don't worry, I'll cut you a deal. You are the center-fold, after all."

"_Center-fold?!_ No, wait, that isn't the point!"

"Aida Kensuke."

The two turned around to see Rei looking at them. Her face was bright, her eyes shiny, two rubies burning in eternal fires. This was the first time Shinji had seen Rei so emotional, so lively, so active. There was something exploding inside of Rei, and all of it was directed at the freckled lad. Shinji felt hope blossom in his chest. Rei was angry with what Kensuke had done! She would put a stop to all this insanity and then everything would go back to normal and he wouldn't have to worry about all these shameful and illicit photos being passed around like he was some rock-bottom porn scum.

"I'll take a copy please." Shinji's jaw dropped as she silently handed a few coins to Kensuke before receiving a book. She flipped through it and stopped. "I'm glad. I was worried that I wouldn't be able to see these photos again when Asuka accidentally broke my camera. Thank you for the opportunity." She gave Kensuke a small bow and went off to read her new merchandise in peace.

"But…but…"

"Oi! Stooge!"

This time, Asuka came stomping up, her face twisted up in fury. Shinji was torn between seeing a homicidal Asuka and a possibly respite from this nightmare that had been inflicted on him. Even Kensuke seemed a bit nervous. Scratch that, he was shaking in his shoes as the flaming redhead bore down upon him, the glint in her eyes promising a slow and excruciatingly painful death.

"What the hell are you doing, publishing this trash?!" She grabbed a magazine, waving it up in the air.

"N-now, A-Asuka. It's j-just a little thing w-we made so we could bring the joy of Sh-Shinji t-to the masses."

"It might as well be pornography!" she screamed. The boy shrunk back, his eyes wild with fear. Asuka seethed, her face twitching. She took a deep breath and slowly let it out. "You should be lucky that I don't beat you and the other stooge to within an inch of your life. But…I'm going to go easy on you. I'll let you off this time, but…!" She shoved a finger in his face, glaring down with all her terrible might. "If I ever, _ever_ see something like this again, I will make you see hell. Ya got that?!"

She stormed off, leaving a still shaking Kensuke and Shinji in her wake. Kensuke sighed, relieved that he had gotten out of it without a scratch. Strange, he would have thought the punishment would be a lot worse than- He blinked.

"Hey! You didn't pay for that one!"

"Don't worry, Kensuke," Hikari whispered to him as she recovered from the rapid selling of the almanac. "I'll get the money from her later."

Ah, Asuka, reigning in all your lovely terror. Such a pleasant way of doing things.

Shinji just whimpered as the next person approached them. "Kaoru…?"

He smiled benignly. "Now, Shinji. These young people are just trying to capitalize on your charm. It would be a shame and a crime if they didn't, and I for one am not about to allow this to slip away." He flashed a bewitching grin at Hikari and Touji. "I'll take three."

Shinji quickly took to silently crying.

The almanacs quickly sold, and there were only a few left when the most surprising person showed up, her capricious gaze swarming across the leftover books. All three of the uprising entrepreneurs gulped in synchronized fashion.

"M-Misato-sensei?"

"My, my," she giggled. "What do we have here? Selling picture books on one of my favorite little students?"

Shinji took the chance and ran with it, quite literally, launching himself at the pretty teacher and latching onto her skirt. His eyes were filled with tears as he bawled almost incoherently to her. "Misato-sensei! You've got to stop them! They're selling all these pictures of me, and now the whole school is going to-!"

His cried and pleas were cut short when a slender finger was put to his mouth. Misato flashed the boy a friendly and brilliant smile. Shinji almost melted at this. This beautiful angel was finally going to free him from this rose prison his supposed friends had shoved him into. He was going to be able to walk to school again without people staring at him or laughing at him or trying to cut pieces out of his clothing to sell on e-bay.

Misato picked up an almanac and flipped through it. She stopped and blinked, her face becoming unreadable. "Shinji…?" Her voice had taken on a sing-song quality. The boy looked up, finding that the older woman had a broad and sultry grin written on her face. "Next time you clean my apartment would you mind dressing in this, Shin-chan?" The book was opened to that _one_ particular page that had started off Shinji's nightmare.

Sorry, Shin-chan. You got a denizen of the wrong spiritual realm.

Shinji began to giggle quietly. And then his brain took the only option that was left for him to escape this crazy reality that had been dumped upon his poor, little body.

His eyes rolled back into his head, and he promptly passed out.

Right, like that's gonna help to do anything. Such a silly, silly little boy.

OTOTOTOTOT

Shinji woke up, his eyes adjusting to the light that was moving in and out thanks to the branches of the tree he was lying under. He sighed. Thank goodness, that was nothing but a dream. A horrible, terrible dream brought up from the deep, murky depths of his subconscious. He was so glad that he wouldn't need to worry about all that stuff now.

"Shinji…?"

He looked up. Rei was staring down at him, her crimson eyes staring right back into his. He blinked before recognizing his surrounding. He was lying down under the tree that they always had lunch at. His head was cradled in Rei's lap, the girl leaning back and supporting her hands on both sides of her body. His head felt comfy and soft. For once, he didn't instantly freak out at their positions. Instead it felt as though he was being held by his mother, embraced by that tender affection that only one could give. He sighed.

"Thank god that was all just a dream."

"Shinji…" She pulled something out and lowered it in front of his face. "That wasn't a dream."

His eyes bugged out. He was just about to cry out when someone else's shouts caught his attention. He looked over to see a crowd that had formed around the table that had been selling the almanacs. Asuka and Kaoru were in a violent discussion with each other, Asuka gesturing wildly while Kaoru had that self-satisfied smirk on his face. Kensuke was taking bets from people on who would win the argument, while Hikari kept tallies and Touji was acting to make sure nothing got too out of hand.

Shinji groaned. Asuka and Kaoru were like oil and fire. The two didn't mix, instead they combined to form a flaming explosion of death that many didn't survive very intact from. Usually Shinji acted as the spark for which the argument took place, and he was getting tired for being the catalyst for one of the most interesting yet destructive debacles that frequently took place in the school. He muttered quietly to himself as he made to get up.

"Looks like I got to try and stop them…again."

He paused when a petite hand placed itself on his chest, preventing him from moving any further. He looked up to see Misato-sensei kneeling down next to them. She put a finger to her lips and winked playfully. "Don't bother them just yet."

"Misato-sensei?" he asked incredulously. "Why aren't you stopping them? Aren't you a teacher?"

She shrugged and smiled. "I might be a teacher but that doesn't mean I don't like to have fun. What they're doing is harmless and funny to watch. Besides…" Misato held up a thumb. "I've got 2000 yen riding on this that Asuka's going to win."

"Say what?!" Shinji turned to Rei, who did nothing but stare back.

"All right, that's _it!_" The crowd took a step back at Asuka's outburst. She lobbed a finger at Kaoru and shook it menacingly. "There's only one way to settle it and it isn't with words!"

"Why?" Kaoru smirked. "Afraid that with my impeccable logic skills and vocabulary you stand absolutely zero chance?"

Asuka growled but forged ahead. "You know what I mean!" She stepped forward and jabbed a finger into the taller boy's ribs. He instinctively winced and took a step back. She grinned and grabbed the initiative. "I challenge you to a race around the school! Whoever loses will have to admit to the winner that their choice for the best photo is the right one!"

Kaoru leaned closed and whispered into her ear. "And gets the private photo session with Shinji?"

She nodded, a hint of blush on her cheeks. "And the private photo session."

Shinji's ears, polished from years of having to strain them to hear whatever threats or dangers were coming his way, were able to hear that last bit and convey the words and their implications to his brain. His face drained of all color. _Photo session?_ He shot to his feet and tried to sneak off, much to the amusement of Rei and Misato.

"Very well!" Kensuke shouted to the crowd. "We shall then begin The Great Shinji Race! All bets should be made now! Who will it be – the hot-headed Sohryu Asuka Langley or the slick Nagisa Kaoru?! Place your bets! And someone make sure the prize doesn't get away!"

Dozens of dozens pairs of eyes swiveled around to focus on the young boy who was trying to do just that. When he heard the order for his capture, Shinji exploded into a run, only to smack into the ground when something constrained his legs and kept him from getting any further He flipped onto his back to try to see who it was, only to discover his betrayer.

"Rei?!"

She nodded, taking the rope that had appeared in her hands and binding the young boy like it was amateur bondage night. A good amount of girls blushed at the scene and fell into dirty fantasies powered by their hormone-drive adolescent minds. Shinji cried as bets were made and things were set up, Misato and Rei flanking each side to cut off any escape routes. Misato happily passed the time by teasing her student and probably violating any and all student-teacher laws that had been passed within the last ten years. Ah, but it was so much fun not to! Rei just made sure she had a handy and tight grip on the rope.

Asuka and Kaoru made their way to the starting line. They looked at each other, the fire of competition burning brightly in their eyes and souls. There were a few other things burning in there as well but not things that could be in all good conscience mentioned thanks to the T-rating this story holds.

"Pretty boy," Asuka sneered.

"Barbarian," Karou returned.

Kensuke went up to them and nodded. "Alright! The course is simple. Just run from here to the other side of the school, pick up the fruit that was generously donated by the school cafeteria, and run back here. Whoever crosses the finish line with their fruit first is the winner." He raised both hands. "Are you ready? Set? GO!"

They took off with a cloud of dust spinning behind them. The students cheered as they raced forward, gleefully anticipating who would win. Shinji just continued to cry.

Asuka and Kaoru were both evenly paced. Both had a lean body structure that was perfect for running, and both practiced in physical activities that honed their bodies – Asuka with martial arts, and Kaoru with fencing. They were already halfway to the checkpoint when Kaoru opened his mouth between light pants.

"Why do you try so hard with him?"

Asuka glanced at him. "Eh? What was that?"

"Shinji. Why do you try so hard? You hurt him and yell at him, yet you spend as much time as possible to be with him. It is a behavior that I find most paradoxical."

Asuka bit down on her lip, refusing to meet his eyes and instead looking straight ahead. "What about you, huh, pretty boy? You're a guy yet you always hang off of him like some kind of damn floozy. What's up with that?"

Kaoru smiled kindly and closed his eyes. He said nothing for a few seconds and then opened them again. Those rose-colored eyes that matched Rei's could have said it all even if he didn't. "Isn't it obvious? I love him."

Asuka stumbled a bit and Kaoru took the chance to pull ahead. When she regained her composure, Asuka increased her pace to try and match Kaoru's without speeding up her decrease in stamina. Her eyes narrowed as she promised herself something. _I won't lose to you._

The two remained quiet as they hit the checkpoint, collected the fruit, and ran back to the starting point, trying to conserve as much energy as they could without any more wasteful actions. As they finally neared it, they saw Rei standing in front of the finish line as if waiting for them to cross. They sped up, their feet flying across the ground. They were head-to-head, neck-and-neck, perfectly even with each other as Rei lifted up her arms…

…And performed a successful clothesline maneuver on them both. The two jerkily halted and went flying into the air, crashing back down to the ground with no breath and extremely sore throats. Rei than calmly ignored the huge double count of assault she had committed, picked up the fruit that they had run so hard to get, and then crossed the finish line herself.

"I win."

The entire schoolyard was quiet as she handed the fruit to Kensuke as proof and then went to collect her prize, the boy speechless and inert as she dragged him away. "Come along, Shinji, I have a new digital camera that I wish to test out."

Kensuke shook himself out of his shock and turned to the large student body. "…And there you have it! The winner of this race, the dark horse that came out of nowhere – Ayanami Rei!"

There was big grumble and words of disbelief as the crowed began to stir back into realization. "Hey wait!" a voice from it shouted. "What about our bets?! Neither of the contestants won!" Noise filtered from out of them as they came to see that this was true.

Kensuke protectively clutched at the bag full of money that held the bets. "Since Rei won, that means that all bets are invalid, and that means we get to keep the money!" The grumbles grew louder and soon became screams of anger and revenge. Kensuke began to sweat as the crowd soon became restless and slight killing intents washed over the area. "Hey! This was perfectly legitimate! And if that isn't true then may lightning strike me now!"

The sky rumbled with thunder as dark clouds began to pour into view. Shadows crept on the ground as the sun was blotted out and tiny crackles of electricity raced through the black horizon. Kensuke gulped.

"I didn't really mean that!"

There was a scream. Everyone turned to see a young female student being swallowed up by…something. It was about a meter tall and was pitch black, the bastard offspring of the shadows. A pair of glowing yellow eyes opened on what might have been its face. Twin antennas sprung from its skull, and the creature waddled in a slouched-over posture. It was dragging the girl into its body, her face ripe with fear. Eventually her screams stopped as she disappeared into the creature's body completely and it turned. Its featureless face, except for those glowing, emotionless eyes, locked onto the others.

The schoolyard fell into panic.

Students went racing around, only to be caught by the other multiple creatures that seemed to grow straight from the ground. Their claws latched onto the students' bodies, sucking them in and erasing them from the lives of others completely.

Rei stopped, one of the creatures appearing in front of her. She positioned herself in front of Shinji without pause, acting as a shield. She would protect him, even if she had no clue how or even how to protect herself. Shinji struggled with his inconvenient bonds, helplessly watching as the creature fell onto Rei, grabbing her and starting to absorb her into its body. Rei lashed at it violently, but the creature didn't even notice or even care.

_Rei!_

Her face had broken and there was a look of complete terror on it. Her entire body trembled as the fear overtook her along with the creature's horrendous ability.

_Rei! What can I do?_

Shinji's struggling became even greater, straining against the ropes and knots.

_What can I possibly do to…?_

"_You have a special power, Shinji."_

He froze.

"_It forms the shape of your soul."_

The cloaked man's words came back to him.

"_Whether it is strong or weak, good or bad is all up to you."_

He had a power. His soul had the power to fight these things.

"_Your heart is your greatest weapon. Use it, be guided by it, and never let it be taken over."_

But he was scared! These things were inhuman! Like nothing he had ever seen before! What could _he_ possibly do to fight any of them?!

"_You can't run away, Ikari Shinji, you have to keep walking forward."_

He paused again. He couldn't run away, he had to move forward.

_I mustn't run away, I mustn't run away._

Something was growing inside of him. Something was taking shape.

_I mustn't run away, I must walk forward._

It was molding itself, obeying his will. A power like no other. A power that no one had granted him. A power that he had had all to himself all along and was only at this point realizing it. It grew and lengthened, becoming infinitely sharp and sturdy. Nothing could break it and nothing could take it away from him.

_I must walk forward, I must defeat it._

Emerging, twisting, he could feel it coming from inside his body outward.

_I will defeat it!_

It arrived.

"DIE, YOU MONSTER!"

A brilliant flash of light encompassed the entire school. The creatures flinched in surprise and fear, letting go of those that they were currently taking into themselves. Their heads turned to the source of the light, recognizing their target. Their instincts said to destroy him, that he was the only one that could threaten them and their continual existence. They began to swarm, like locust onto a wheat field.

Rei opened her eyes. She felt warm, not cold and slimy like that creature that had been pulling her in. She felt a strong arm around her, snugly set around her waist. It was a familiar sensation, one that she had come to cherish. Looking to her side, she saw that it was Shinji that held her. He stood like one of those heroes from a cheesy-romance novel. Rei was pressed tight to him with one arm, his other arm extended and holding an object that was jabbed into the creature.

Shinji's face was set in grim determination. His eyes were narrowed, his lips in a thin line. He twisted the object he had gutted the creature with and then removed it. The creature slumped forward and then slowly began to dissolve away. A bright reddish swirl of fog and light grew from its body, escaping and then rising quickly into the sky. It was hard to tell what it was but Rei could have sworn it was in the vague shape of a…heart?

Her view then went to the object in Shinji's hand. Her eyes widened.

It was a long metallic weapon that was in the form of a giant key. The handle fit loosely around Shinji's hand, and the teeth of the key were at the end of where the blade was supposed to be. The teeth glittered, revealing the razor-sharp point where the blade actually was. Hanging on the handle was a keychain that dangled aimlessly, held together by a simple design of a person with eight wings. The weapon was simple, sleek, and absolutely beautiful.

Something nudged Shinji in the back of his mind. He turned just to see a squad of the creatures flying through the air at him.

Only one thought prevailed in their minds. Fight him, destroy him, consume him.

Consume the Wielder of the Keyblade!

Shinji met them head on. From years of hard training in kendo with his father, from years of reflexes honed with avoiding Asuka's strikes and Rei's advances, and from years of very thinly veiled and repressed aggression, Shinji swung the keyblade in a wide arc, smashing all of them in one clean hit. They smacked into the ground, but he didn't give them the chance to recover as he dove in, striking and piercing each of them as they dissolved to nothingness.

He turned to Rei and reached out a hand. "Are you okay?" She simply nodded and took his hand, and the two ran into the swarm of creatures.

Meanwhile, Asuka was having a rough time. After recovering from Rei's unwarranted attack she soon found herself being on the receiving end of an onslaught by one of the strange beings. Luckily her martial arts training came back to her, and she was able to avoid being sucked in. But no matter how many times she hit the creature it refused to stay down. She was soon finding that between the race and the strain fighting the thing, her stamina was burning out. She panted heavily and stood there.

The creature didn't look like it was tired. In fact, it looked like it didn't even feel her strikes. What kind of thing was it? Asuka shifted forward, but her weakened legs gave out and she stumbled forwards. The creature took the opportunity presented and launched itself, its claws aiming for her head. Asuka closed her eyes, her thoughts revolving on a certain thick-headed brunette as she awaited her imminent demise.

"Asuka!"

She opened them. Shinji jumped in front of her, bisecting the creature in one clean movement. Rei was then quickly at her side, supporting her on a shoulder. Asuka looked between Rei's assuring gaze and then at her childhood friend. "Shin…ji…?"

"Where are Kaoru and the others?! I've got to find them, quick!"

A flash of disappointment at his lack of concern for her briefly flitted through her mind. But quickly taking notice of the situation she realized that this was no time for jealousy. She raised a finger and point in a direction to Shinji's left. "They were over the-"

Mad laughter interrupted her. The three looked over to see Kaoru surrounded by a group of the creatures. But instead of attacking they merely observed him. A circle of grayish-blue light was under the boy. He had a hand to his face, covering his eyes. His was laughing loudly, the taint of madness dripping into his tone. "Yes! I can see it! I understand it all now! _This_ is what I was searching for!"

"Kaoru!" Shinji sprinted at him, bashing through any of the creatures that came onto his path.

"Shinji?" He removed the hand and looked, his crimson eyes smiling kindly. "Shinji, it is you!"

"Kaoru!" He slashed through another one. "Kaoru, what are you doing?! We have to get out of here!"

"Shinji, the other worlds are waiting." He spread his arms wide as if basking in the glow of everything. "They're waiting for us Shinji. All their dreams, all their knowledge, all their adventure. They're just waiting, ripe for the picking."

"What are you talking about?!"

"Don't you want to come with me?" He extended a hand, his slender fingers moving gracefully. "You said you would. You promised you would."

"Kaoru? There's no time for that!" He blocked when one of the creatures slashed at him, and then tossed it over his shoulder. He reached his other hand out, trying to grab hold of Kaoru's. "Come back with us, please!" A fear was growing in him. A fear that if he didn't get Kaoru now, grab his hand and never let go, he would never see the boy again. He had to catch him.

Kaoru's face flinched, his eyes full of betrayal. He lowered his hand and stepped back. "I see." His voice was low, almost a whisper. "You're just like the others, aren't you, Shinji? I thought you might be different but…" He looked up, his eyes losing their warmth, losing their joy. "You're just like all of them – stupid and afraid." They were like ice now, hard, cold crystals of blood and ice.

"It was fun…but I guess this is the end. Goodbye now…Shinji."

The ground below him brightened, and the shadows crept up, engulfing him. Then with a burst of dark light, he disappeared.

"Kaoru?" Shinji fell to his knees. "Kaoru?" Something shook his shoulder. He looked over it.

"Shinji!" Asuka cried. "We've got to go! NERV is here with a VTOL! They're going to get us to safety!"

Shinji felt numb, cold, alone. He felt like someone had ripped out a part of him and then burned it to ashes. But looking at Asuka who was staring at him grimly, and Rei who was just standing there quietly, waiting, he realized that there were other parts of him that were still alive…and so very warm.

He nodded and took each of their outstretched hands, running for the aerial vehicle that was parked a little bit away, its turbines still rotating noisily. They climbed on board, helped by the pilots and assistants. Immediately Shinji found himself pulled into a strong hug, his head bouncing upon something that was very firm and soft. He looked up, and found himself staring into the blue eyes of a very buxom and pretty red-haired lady.

"M-M-Mrs. Sohryu!" he sputtered out. Kyoko, the single mother of Asuka smiled brightly at him, holding him closer to her voluptuous body. He blushed furiously, remembering all the other times she had done the exact same thing to him, and also remembering the exact way Asuka reacted to all of those incidents.

"Mama!"

"Hello, Asuka dear. I'm so glad that you're all safe and sound."

"That's not the point! Let go of Shinji, now!"

She tutted softly. "I'm afraid I can't do that. Especially with all that chaos happening below. I have to make sure little Shin-chan is kept all safe and sound." Her eyes flashed, an unknown emotion running through them.

Rei picked up on it instantly. "Where…" Her voice was soft and low. "Where are the others?"

Kyoko smiled sadly. "They're all gone, Rei."

All three of their eyes went wide. Shinji swiftly and violently struggled to free himself from Kyoko's grasp and dived for the edge of the plane. What he saw disturbed him on a level beyond anything he could have imagined.

The yard was completely swallowed by darkness. There was nothing left, nothing that could have once been the high school of Tokyo-3. It was all shadows and darkness. The ground was crumbling away, falling into a void of eternal night. Something large was emerging from it. A being that was stories tall and dripping shadows like they were sweat. Gargantuan, evil, and eyes that burned coldly.

"Turn back!" Shinji yelled at the pilot. "We've gotta turn back. There's gotta be some people still alive!"

"Shinji, listen to me!" Kyoko's sharp words caught his attention. He looked at her, his thoughts and feelings clearly showing through his face. The Weapons Designer of Nerv sighed internally. There was no reason for him to go through this, no viable excuse that could explain away the pain that awaited him. But he was the only one, and she had to tell him. "Shinji, there's only a few things I can tell you right now. Your parents will explain the rest at NERV headquarters but there are a few things I can tell you now."

She took a deep breath. "Those things you fought are called Akuma, that weapon you hold is called the keyblade, and _you_..." She pointed a finger directly at him. "Are the only possible savior of our world and every one outside ours. _You_ are the person that will battle the darkness and protect all of existence from eternal damnation."

The three looked shell-shocked at her revelation. Then, as one, they said the one thing that came to all their minds.

"No…fuc-"

Perhaps life really is like a watch. Because if this moment is any indication, we should expect a whole lot of bashing and cursing any second now.

The die has been rolled, the timer has been set, and we are on our way to the real adventure!

Cue ominous _everything_.

A/N: Well, that's the end. You'll notice that there was a lot less humor near the end as I figured it'd be hard to slip it in without spoiling the mood. Hopefully I'll get better at integrating the two as the story progresses. In other news, this chapter was actually cut short when I realized I'd have another crazy long chapter if I continued. Whether that's a good or bad thing is up to you. In any case I really liked it and I hope you did to. Please review and remember, no flames!

_Next Chapter Preview!_

Shinji: So this is the new world?

Asuka: Huh, it doesn't look as cool and colorful as they made it to be.

Black Mage: It will once I get some blood flowing from you.

Shinji: Ah! Who the hell are you?!

White Mage: We're here to help you on your journey to save all the worlds from darkness!

Thief: And make some money along the way, too.

Rei: Shinji, I would suggest you keep a tight hold upon any possessions you want to keep.

Red Mage: Ah, all of this simply fantabulous! Who designs your clothes?

Shinji: My head really hurts.

Rei: Next time on Organization XVIII – Minute Expectations (or) Not People You Should Turn Your Back On.

Fighter: I like your sword.

Shinji: Umm…thanks?


End file.
